10 Terrifying Sports Mascots to Get You in the Mood for Halloween

Every October, the usual suspects emerge: vampires, werewolves, ghosts, skeletons. But there is a category of monster that has been right under our noses and totally overlooked for decades: the sports mascot. Having taken a deep dive into this bizarre sporting tradition, we've found some extremely disturbing figures. If you need a good scare this Halloween season, just turn off all the lights and find some footage of the following.

WuShock, Wichita State Shockers

WuShock is what would have happened if Frankenstein had built his flat-headed monster out of Gary Busey, Gordon Ramsey and Bart Simpson. Is he laughing? Is he angry? Does he want you to, in fact, have a cow? That face tells you everything you need to know. (The answers are yes, yes, and yes.)

The Phanatic, Philadelphia Phillies 

It's a question everyone utters when they encounter the Phillies' Phanatic for the first time: What is he? Well, the Phanatic is tired of your interminable questions. The Phanatic doesn't have time to deal with your impertinence. If you're not careful, when you leave the stadium, The Phanatic will be waiting outside, hiding behind your car, ready to press his green, horned face up against yours. "Ask. Me. Again," he'll growl menacingly. "Go on. Ask."

Purdue Pete, Purdue Boilermakers

Purdue Pete has the distinction of being the only mascot out there to carry a weapon. That thing he's resting on his shoulder? It's a giant mallet. Legend has it that Pete's unblinking eyes scan stadiums, hunting for fans not cheering loudly enough, then, smirking all the while, bashes them to death with his ever-ready hammer of punishment. Just kidding. We made all that up. But doesn't he look like he might do that?

Billy, Miami Marlins

Billy doesn't need to carry a weapon because his face already is one. Also, what's up with those creepy shoes? Just... steer clear of Billy.

The Coyote, San Antonio Spurs

The Coyote's eyes are wide, shattered green windows into his broken soul. His expression suggests extreme caffeination and the kind of mania that comes with chronic sleep deprivation. So when the Coyote tells you to scream, you scream, fearful of what horrors might befall those who don't obey.

Gritty, Philadelphia Flyers

Cocaine is a helluva drug.

Kingsley, Partick Thistle FC

Kingsley's arms are attached to his face. Kingsley's neck runs straight into his groin. Kingsley's head is covered in spikes. No wonder Kingsley's face is permanently twisted into a furious grimace all the time. Be smart. Run away from Kingsley.

Mr. Met, New York Mets 

You know in American Horror Story: Cult, when that team of clowns was menacing an entire neighborhood with murder and mayhem? Well, Mr. Met looks like he's about three steps away from being in that crew. Keep your knives locked up, Citi Field.

Sluggerrr, Kansas City Royals 

Forget The Human Centipede, or any of the twisted punishments handed out during Hostel; they've got nothing on what has happened to Sluggerrr. This piteous lion has been hideously mutilated; his skull fused with a crown, in a twisted mockery of his species' reigning title as King of the Jungle. The end result? The top of his head is missing, open to the elements, and his brain is constantly at risk of falling out of his skull. It's no way to live.

King Cake Baby, New Orleans Pelicans

Unspeakable in his horror, unfathomable in his inception, King Cake Baby never grows old, never dies and has only two fangs in his gaping, hideous mouth. The New Orleans Pelicans haven't said it directly, but the evidence suggests that King Cake Baby is definitely a vampire. Only 100 million times scarier.