We thought the only time this week that the nation would collectively stop and stare slack-jawed at something was on Monday, during the eclipse. But that was before Taylor Swift announced she had new music coming out this week, with this:
And also this:
And most tantalizingly of all, this:
The world knew something was up yesterday, when she posted a couple of shadowy videos of snakes, but now we’ve got ratty-sweater, greasy-hair, that-choker-looks-a-bit-tight-but-the-lipstick-is-still-perfection Taylor Swift, hysteria has fully kicked in.
She looks pissed, you guys, and — as the long history of talking smack about her exes in song form proves — Swift is at her best when she’s pissed.
Predictably, Twitter had a lot to say for itself:
me, this morning: yeah I guess a new Taylor Swift album would be cool
me, now: I AM GETTING REPUTATION TATTOOED ON MY FACE
— Samantha Tomaszewski (@managewski) August 23, 2017
IM LOSING MY MIND
— Taylor Swift Updates (@SimplySFans) August 23, 2017
Very excited for this [squints] straight-to-Hulu documentary about the sensational murder trial of a mysterious babysitter pic.twitter.com/gVg2feFlkM
— Jason O. Gilbert (@gilbertjasono) August 23, 2017
If she don't finesse a sample of the Kanye "reputation" couplets this was a waste.
— Craig Bro Dude (@CraigSJ) August 23, 2017
— Brenna Thomale (@BrennaCarin1) August 23, 2017
Voldemort better watch out! The NEW heir of slytherin Taylor Swift is here to snatch wigs! She's coming for blood this era! Queen of snakes!
— Ricky Dillon (@RickyPDillon) August 23, 2017
taylor swift is not trying to take on politics or fake news she is criticizing the entertainment media which has defamed her for years pic.twitter.com/Gte0NWwaXt
— paige hettinger (@paigehettinger) August 23, 2017
Me introducing myself to class: hi I'm sara, buy Reputation on iTunes, November 10th, taylor swift is saving music
— sara ✨ (@just_trees13) August 23, 2017
There is no better feeling than listening to a new Taylor Swift song for the first time I can't believe that's tomorrow
— Leighanne (@fearlessleigh) August 23, 2017
Hang onto your butts — a new era is coming.