0:10: The producers obviously told this musician to get as close to that sad, one-eyed dog Sarah McLachlan song as possible. We want all the feels! they probably yelled. They could have saved time and just used this Green Day song:
0:14: Thomas walks through an empty room. If the Crawleys aren't already bankrupt, they will be after what's sure to be a massive U-Haul bill. All those famous paintings and their gilded frames, the ornate rugs, the canopy beds! Not to mention that huge gramophone that really pissed off the Dowager that one time!
0:15: Lady Mary and Daisy turn and are really surprised...like Beyonce-just-dropped-a-whole-album-with-music-videos-on-a-quiet-Friday-night surprised. Maybe Sybil walked in wearing whatever 1927's version of harem pants is and everything that "happened" after her "death" was a preeclampsia fever dream? Make it right, Julian Fellowes, make it right!
0:17: Thomas opens a door and seems really over it all. All that meddling and scheming and lurking and he's still stuck in a job he hates without a make out buddy.
0:19: The father of Daisy's late sort-of husband hugs her while looking at the stone house that will now be hers. Dear kids, stay in school...and be too polite to say "yeah, no" when a dying guy you've gone on zero dates with asks you to marry him. You'll get a cute rent-controlled place out of it!
0:20: Lady Edith is wearing gems on her forehead! I also spy a lemon twist in a half-empty cocktail glass. So I'm going to assume the writers have had their fill of making her utterly miserable and are going to let her drink gin and flirt and stop sobbing in corners. Yeah, probably not.
0:22: Anna smiles because her Debbie Downer husband isn't around. We smile too.
0:23: Mrs. Patmore dances in the kitchen with a cop because she deserves a break.
0:24: Mrs. Hughes smiles because Anna's Debbie Downer husband isn't around. We smile again.
0:25: Carson weirdly pets a bedspread.
0:29: Anna attempts to have a heart-to-heart with Mary. Mary cannot oblige because she is a sociopath.
0:32: There's a net connected to Mary's bowler hat. It's raining. Mary gets wet, while walking with a purpose. She knows what she must do: she must kill her annoying sister.
0:33: Why did it take 33 seconds to get a shot of Maggie Smith? If they want us to watch, the first 33 seconds should have just been the Dowager eating soup really primly or rolling her eyes at loud birds or something. Know your audience!
0:35: Carson kisses Mrs. Hughes...on the forehead. At this rate, one of them will die before they get around to having sex.
0:37: Daisy is still super stoked about the house she got out of pretending to be in love with a dead person.
0:38: Anna's Debbie Downer husband is back. Her smile is replaced with sobbing.
0:40: Someone drives recklessly. Haven't we learned anything from Matthew's sudden demise?
0:41: Thomas walks in on the new guy doing something weird and maybe sexual. Oo la la!
0:42: The servants are at church ceremony. Thomas and new guy get married?! Nope, gotta wait approximately 100 years for that one. It's probably Mrs. Hughes and Carson. You should have dated a little before you committed to a lifetime of forehead kisses, Mrs. Hughes!
0:44: Mary feels an emotion! Or maybe she's just mocking Edith again.
0:45: The babies run adorably. Sybbie is in America though so we don't care that much.
0:46: I knew the forehead jewels and cocktails wouldn't last. Edith is distraught again.
0:47: Daisy finds out some really good gossip.
0:49: The Dowager makes a cute face.
0:52: The Crawleys get out of their cars and look up at what's probably their new digs. Smaller circular driveway off of a major road (can you imagine?!) and probably a smaller moat too. Hard times.
0:56: A British lady reminds us that people in the UK will be able to watch the new season starting in September, while all of us Yanks have to wait 'til 2016. All these years later and this arrangement still makes zero sense. And this is the final time we get to complain about it so make it good!
