Photos of Weird Victorian Couples to Ruin Your Valentine’s Day
Black History and Love Intertwine at These February Bay Area Concerts
Earnest or Playful, Your Valentine’s Card Has a History
Why Hip-Hop Artist Mystic is Devoting February to Revolutionary Love
Are We Using 'Self-Care' as a Way Out of Relationships?
How a Mathematician and a Designer Ignite Each Other’s Creative Spark
Colman Domingo Wants to Spend Valentine’s Day With You
Finding Acceptance—and Self-Love—in a Naturist Community
It’s Not Me, It’s You: Choosing Singledom in the Pandemic
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Born and raised in Wales, she started her career in London, as a music journalist for uproarious rock ’n’ roll magazine, \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kerrang.com/features/an-oral-history-of-alternative-tentacles-40-years-of-keeping-punk-alive/\">Kerrang!\u003c/a>\u003c/em>. In America, she got her start at alt-weeklies including \u003ca href=\"https://archives.sfweekly.com/sanfrancisco/ArticleArchives?author=2127078&excludeCategoryType=Blog\">\u003cem>SF Weekly\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and the \u003ca href=\"https://www.villagevoice.com/author/raealexandra/\">\u003cem>Village Voice\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, and freelanced for a great many other publications. Her undying love for San Francisco has, more recently, turned her into \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/tag/bayareahistory/\">a history nerd\u003c/a>. 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Eternal. Binding. Great when you’re in it. Often supremely irritating to look at when you’re not. If you find yourself lacking relationship inspiration as we approach this year’s \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/20463/the-dark-and-twisted-history-of-valentines-day\">Valentine’s Day\u003c/a>, please consider this a heart-shaped candy box from us to you. Ten couples from San Francisco history who just can’t help but remind us that relationships aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='arts_13874348']Please now gaze upon their perplexed, dejected faces and imagine the stilted conversations that occurred before and after these portraits were taken. May they stand as a reminder that sometimes, being alone is better than being saddled with someone else…\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Up first! Look at this duo from 1890. Gaze deep into their eyes and ponder the souls within. An abyss of darkness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950574\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 637px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950574\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.02417.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian era couple pose in a studio, she sitting, he standing. They both look confused and perhaps a little angry.\" width=\"637\" height=\"1000\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.02417.jpg 637w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.02417-160x251.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 637px) 100vw, 637px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘You talkin’ to us? You talkin’ to us?! Then who the hell else are you talkin’ to? We’re the only ones here…’ etc. \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp37.02417)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Ah, to be visiting the Cliff House with this cheery couple from 1900.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950531\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950531\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0172.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian woman in a hat and a large man in a suit pose on a bench in front of an image of the Cliff House in San Francisco.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"706\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0172.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0172-800x565.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0172-160x113.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0172-768x542.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘The thing that really drew me to Malcolm was that really special way he does his jackets up.’ \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.0172)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Then there are these two from 1900, in the middle of paying a visit to \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/13909983/victorian-attractions-san-francisco-chutes-gravity-railroad-woodwards-gardens-bonet-tower-auditorium-skating\">the Haight Street Chutes\u003c/a> (a giant waterslide, ridden in a flat-bottomed boat that existed between 1895 and 1902). What a barrel of laughs they’re having!\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950537\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 740px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950537\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp27.7774.jpg\" alt=\"A man and a woman sit very straight-faced in front of an image depicting a giant water slide.\" width=\"740\" height=\"1000\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp27.7774.jpg 740w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp27.7774-160x216.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 740px) 100vw, 740px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Fairly certain that Amanda Knox is a reincarnation of this woman. \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp27.7774)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Our next couple is clearly having the time of their lives, yes, but look where they’re doing it — all over the rubble of the 1906 earthquake. Like raging, fork-stealing psychopaths.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950530\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950530\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/earthqua.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian couple gazes at each other and smiles while walking across piles of bricks and ruins.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"862\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/earthqua.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/earthqua-800x690.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/earthqua-160x138.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/earthqua-768x662.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘Babe, you’re so damn sexy that when I’m with you it feels, like, totally fine to dance on the rubble of other people’s hopes and dreams.’ ‘Same, Arnold. Same.’ \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp37.01299)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>I don’t want to make groundless accusations or anything but these two look like they’ve got a body hidden in their basement.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950586\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 590px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950586\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp14.11172.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian couple stands on the side of a road. \" width=\"590\" height=\"1000\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp14.11172.jpg 590w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp14.11172-160x271.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 590px) 100vw, 590px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">This was taken on the Great Highway circa 1910 — an excellent location to plot an escape strategy. Coincidence? \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp14.11172)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Don’t have a date this year? Please find comfort in this super-awkward double date that took place at the Premium Postal Studio at 1311 Fillmore Street in the 1910s.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950534\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950534\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1005.jpg\" alt=\"Two men and two women stand within a prop cutout that resembles a hot air balloon.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"740\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1005.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1005-800x592.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1005-160x118.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1005-768x568.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">This whole thing was masterminded by the guy on the left. You can just tell. \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.1005)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>These two are basically just in training for the haunting they’re going to do after they’ve crashed that car into the side of the house.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950575\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950575\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.03219.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian couple sitting in an early automobile outside a large house.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"722\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.03219.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.03219-800x578.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.03219-160x116.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.03219-768x554.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Here we see a couple outside the McLaren Lodge on Stanyan Street in the 1910s. Ten bucks says they’re still there. \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp37.03219)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>The photographer for this one really captured the unfiltered joy and unabashed closeness of this couple, didn’t he? Perfection!\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950576\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950576\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0174.jpg\" alt=\"A man and a woman pose inside a prop car in a photo studio. Turn of the century.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"667\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0174.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0174-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0174-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0174-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">I don’t know. Something about it just screams ‘I make her walk behind me in the street.’ \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.0174)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Look. \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/13866892/an-exhibit-explores-victorian-mourning-customs-ahead-of-halloween\">Victorian mourning garb\u003c/a> was weird and all, but letting anyone leave the house with half an emu on their head is just downright cruel and unusual. Bad husbanding, bro.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950533\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950533\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0977.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian couple sits in front of an image of San Francisco's Cliff House. \" width=\"1000\" height=\"753\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0977.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0977-800x602.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0977-160x120.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0977-768x578.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘What’s the secret to a good marriage? Being really, really into unfathomable hats.’ \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.0977)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Finally, there’s this wild and wacky couple from 1911. Bob’s letting his lady friend sit at the wheel of the car, sure, but you can practically hear the sound of his ego breaking under the weight of it. Clench that jaw a little tighter, my man!\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950539\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950539\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1012.jpg\" alt=\"A man and woman pose inside a car in front of a backdrop featuring San Francisco’s Cliff House.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"755\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1012.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1012-800x604.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1012-160x121.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1012-768x580.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘Our marriage was in real trouble for a while, but now, every two weeks or so, I let Meredith pretend-drive this prop car. Really gives her a sense of independence, you know?’ \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.1012)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone! May you ignore everything that just happened and go find a wooden rendition of a donkey to have a cuddle on — just like these cutie pies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950535\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950535\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1026.jpg\" alt=\"A 1920s-era couple sits on a prop donkey in front of a backdrop of San Francisco's cliff house.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"783\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1026.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1026-800x626.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1026-160x125.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1026-768x601.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Relationship goals. \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.1026)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"May your Feb. 14 not involve sitting in a prop car with half an emu on your head.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1707446055,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":15,"wordCount":725},"headData":{"title":"Victorian Portraits of Uncomfortable Couples for Valentine's Day | KQED","description":"May your Feb. 14 not involve sitting in a prop car with half an emu on your head.","ogTitle":"Photos of Weird Victorian San Francisco Couples to Inspire Your Valentine’s Day","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"Photos of Weird Victorian San Francisco Couples to Inspire Your Valentine’s Day","twDescription":"","twImgId":"","socialTitle":"Victorian Portraits of Uncomfortable Couples for Valentine's Day %%page%% %%sep%% KQED","schema":{"@context":"http://schema.org","@type":"Article","headline":"Photos of Weird Victorian Couples to Ruin Your Valentine’s Day","datePublished":"2024-02-09T17:00:42.000Z","dateModified":"2024-02-09T02:34:15.000Z","image":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/KQED-OG-Image@1x.png"}},"sticky":false,"templateType":"standard","featuredImageType":"standard","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","articleAge":"0","path":"/arts/13950526/san-francisco-couples-victorian-valentines-day-history-bay-area-portraits","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Ah, love. Eternal. Binding. Great when you’re in it. Often supremely irritating to look at when you’re not. If you find yourself lacking relationship inspiration as we approach this year’s \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/20463/the-dark-and-twisted-history-of-valentines-day\">Valentine’s Day\u003c/a>, please consider this a heart-shaped candy box from us to you. Ten couples from San Francisco history who just can’t help but remind us that relationships aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"arts_13874348","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>Please now gaze upon their perplexed, dejected faces and imagine the stilted conversations that occurred before and after these portraits were taken. May they stand as a reminder that sometimes, being alone is better than being saddled with someone else…\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Up first! Look at this duo from 1890. Gaze deep into their eyes and ponder the souls within. An abyss of darkness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950574\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 637px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950574\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.02417.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian era couple pose in a studio, she sitting, he standing. They both look confused and perhaps a little angry.\" width=\"637\" height=\"1000\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.02417.jpg 637w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.02417-160x251.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 637px) 100vw, 637px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘You talkin’ to us? You talkin’ to us?! Then who the hell else are you talkin’ to? We’re the only ones here…’ etc. \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp37.02417)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Ah, to be visiting the Cliff House with this cheery couple from 1900.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950531\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950531\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0172.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian woman in a hat and a large man in a suit pose on a bench in front of an image of the Cliff House in San Francisco.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"706\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0172.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0172-800x565.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0172-160x113.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0172-768x542.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘The thing that really drew me to Malcolm was that really special way he does his jackets up.’ \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.0172)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Then there are these two from 1900, in the middle of paying a visit to \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/13909983/victorian-attractions-san-francisco-chutes-gravity-railroad-woodwards-gardens-bonet-tower-auditorium-skating\">the Haight Street Chutes\u003c/a> (a giant waterslide, ridden in a flat-bottomed boat that existed between 1895 and 1902). What a barrel of laughs they’re having!\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950537\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 740px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950537\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp27.7774.jpg\" alt=\"A man and a woman sit very straight-faced in front of an image depicting a giant water slide.\" width=\"740\" height=\"1000\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp27.7774.jpg 740w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp27.7774-160x216.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 740px) 100vw, 740px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Fairly certain that Amanda Knox is a reincarnation of this woman. \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp27.7774)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Our next couple is clearly having the time of their lives, yes, but look where they’re doing it — all over the rubble of the 1906 earthquake. Like raging, fork-stealing psychopaths.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950530\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950530\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/earthqua.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian couple gazes at each other and smiles while walking across piles of bricks and ruins.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"862\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/earthqua.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/earthqua-800x690.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/earthqua-160x138.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/earthqua-768x662.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘Babe, you’re so damn sexy that when I’m with you it feels, like, totally fine to dance on the rubble of other people’s hopes and dreams.’ ‘Same, Arnold. Same.’ \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp37.01299)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>I don’t want to make groundless accusations or anything but these two look like they’ve got a body hidden in their basement.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950586\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 590px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950586\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp14.11172.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian couple stands on the side of a road. \" width=\"590\" height=\"1000\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp14.11172.jpg 590w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp14.11172-160x271.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 590px) 100vw, 590px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">This was taken on the Great Highway circa 1910 — an excellent location to plot an escape strategy. Coincidence? \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp14.11172)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Don’t have a date this year? Please find comfort in this super-awkward double date that took place at the Premium Postal Studio at 1311 Fillmore Street in the 1910s.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950534\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950534\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1005.jpg\" alt=\"Two men and two women stand within a prop cutout that resembles a hot air balloon.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"740\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1005.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1005-800x592.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1005-160x118.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1005-768x568.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">This whole thing was masterminded by the guy on the left. You can just tell. \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.1005)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>These two are basically just in training for the haunting they’re going to do after they’ve crashed that car into the side of the house.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950575\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950575\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.03219.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian couple sitting in an early automobile outside a large house.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"722\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.03219.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.03219-800x578.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.03219-160x116.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp37.03219-768x554.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Here we see a couple outside the McLaren Lodge on Stanyan Street in the 1910s. Ten bucks says they’re still there. \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp37.03219)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>The photographer for this one really captured the unfiltered joy and unabashed closeness of this couple, didn’t he? Perfection!\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950576\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950576\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0174.jpg\" alt=\"A man and a woman pose inside a prop car in a photo studio. Turn of the century.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"667\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0174.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0174-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0174-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0174-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">I don’t know. Something about it just screams ‘I make her walk behind me in the street.’ \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.0174)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Look. \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/13866892/an-exhibit-explores-victorian-mourning-customs-ahead-of-halloween\">Victorian mourning garb\u003c/a> was weird and all, but letting anyone leave the house with half an emu on their head is just downright cruel and unusual. Bad husbanding, bro.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950533\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950533\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0977.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian couple sits in front of an image of San Francisco's Cliff House. \" width=\"1000\" height=\"753\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0977.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0977-800x602.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0977-160x120.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.0977-768x578.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘What’s the secret to a good marriage? Being really, really into unfathomable hats.’ \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.0977)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Finally, there’s this wild and wacky couple from 1911. Bob’s letting his lady friend sit at the wheel of the car, sure, but you can practically hear the sound of his ego breaking under the weight of it. Clench that jaw a little tighter, my man!\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950539\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950539\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1012.jpg\" alt=\"A man and woman pose inside a car in front of a backdrop featuring San Francisco’s Cliff House.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"755\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1012.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1012-800x604.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1012-160x121.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1012-768x580.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘Our marriage was in real trouble for a while, but now, every two weeks or so, I let Meredith pretend-drive this prop car. Really gives her a sense of independence, you know?’ \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.1012)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone! May you ignore everything that just happened and go find a wooden rendition of a donkey to have a cuddle on — just like these cutie pies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13950535\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 1000px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13950535\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1026.jpg\" alt=\"A 1920s-era couple sits on a prop donkey in front of a backdrop of San Francisco's cliff house.\" width=\"1000\" height=\"783\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1026.jpg 1000w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1026-800x626.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1026-160x125.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2024/01/opensfhistory_wnp70.1026-768x601.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Relationship goals. \u003ccite>(OpenSFHistory / wnp70.1026)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/arts/13950526/san-francisco-couples-victorian-valentines-day-history-bay-area-portraits","authors":["11242"],"categories":["arts_1","arts_7862","arts_11615"],"tags":["arts_3931","arts_1146","arts_3923"],"featImg":"arts_13950580","label":"arts"},"arts_13951693":{"type":"posts","id":"arts_13951693","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"arts","id":"13951693","score":null,"sort":[1707351491000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"black-history-valentines-day-concerts-jazz-soul-sf-bay-area","title":"Black History and Love Intertwine at These February Bay Area Concerts","publishDate":1707351491,"format":"standard","headTitle":"Black History and Love Intertwine at These February Bay Area Concerts | KQED","labelTerm":{"site":"arts"},"content":"\u003cp>I’m hardly the first person to note that setting aside the four weeks of February to celebrate Black history can feel a little backhanded, given that it’s shortest month of the year. But the heart of winter also contains a holiday dedicated to romance, love and eros, and too little has been made of Black History Month’s coupling with Valentine’s Day, particularly given Black music’s essential role as the soundtrack for love in all its many manifestations. [aside postid='arts_13925077']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>No force in American culture better evokes the jumbled, intermingled emotions, impulses and sensations we stuff into the Hermione’s handbag definition of love, which encompasses everything from carnal longing for a forbidden caress to desperate desire for unity with God. And in much the same way that classical Persian poets like Rumi and Hafez transmute spiritual ardor into the language of earthly passion, soul and R&B can transpose the ecstasy of Sunday morning worship into Saturday night revelry.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Bay Area is blessed with a multitude of artists who are eloquent in these musical love languages, like the polymathic actor, songwriter, event curator and smoldering soulman Martin Luther McCoy. He’s celebrating Feb. 14 with a tribute to Sade at the SFJAZZ Center, “\u003ca href=\"https://www.sfjazz.org/tickets/productions/23-24/martin-luther-mccoy-sade-tribute/\">No Ordinary Love\u003c/a>,” a concert in which he’ll be slipping some of his original songs into the mix. (McCoy performs another Sade tribute on March 9 at \u003ca href=\"https://blackcatsf.turntabletickets.com/\">San Francisco’s Black Cat\u003c/a>, followed by a Prince tribute on March 10.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Growing up in San Francisco, McCoy absorbed a broad sacred-to-secular spectrum of Black music, picking up Parliament from his older brother while “my parents were more into gospel and the church,” he said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=he3DB5AqKpw\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The McCoy household resounded with the artists who pioneered the soul aesthetic, like Dinah Washington, Ray Charles and Sam Cooke, whose classic live album \u003cem>Sam Cooke at the Copa “\u003c/em>was playing on the car tape deck every time we’d go to church,” he recalled. While Sade’s music eschews gospel’s melismatic drama in favor of lithe, cool-toned lines, McCoy brings extroverted fervor to every musical situation, whether he’s in singer-songwriter mode, accompanying himself on acoustic guitar, or belting out Sly Stone anthems with the SFJAZZ Collective. He’s releasing a new album Feb. 14, \u003cem>Welcome Back Love\u003c/em>, making his own statement about the enduring power of romantic Black music. And on March\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For suave, swoon-inducing old-school R&B, no Bay Area artist has carried the torch with more style than Nicolas Bearde, who performs at North Beach’s \u003ca href=\"https://keysjazzbistro.com/upcoming-shows/\">Keys Jazz Bistro Feb. 10\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.caltix.com/e/saturday-nicolas-bearde-valentines-special-2/tickets\">Mama Kins in San Jose\u003c/a> on Valentine’s Day and Oakland’s \u003ca href=\"https://piedmontpiano.com/calendar/2024/2/18/nicolas-bearde\">Piedmont Piano Company Feb. 18\u003c/a>. He brings a vast world of experience to the stage, from performances with Linda Tillery’s field-hollers-to-hip-hop Cultural Heritage Choir to Bobby McFerrin’s improvisation-laced a cappella Voicestra and its spin-off SoVoSó.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOddHmSeQ5w\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As a solo artist he earned an avid following crooning sophisticated R&B, but Bearde has evolved in recent years into a captivating jazz singer whose easy-going authority on ballads and mid-tempo swingers distinguished his 2019 album \u003cem>I Remember You: The Music of Nat King Cole.\u003c/em> He notes that the marriage of church and nightclub was “somewhat controversial at first.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The AME church I went to as a young person in Nashville would never have allowed a drum kit and electric bass,” he said. “That was devil music. The only thing you’d have is piano. Not even a tambourine. But the church a block away, when that band got to thumping sometimes I wished I could have got in there. It sounded like they were having a good time.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When you’re looking for swaggering blues-drenched authority, Jamie Davis is the cat to call. He’s the headliner Feb. 17 at “\u003ca href=\"https://www.lesherartscenter.org/Home/Components/Calendar/Event/16606/3094\">Playing In the Key of Life\u003c/a>” at Walnut Creek’s Lesher Center for the Arts, where the Unity Music Foundation presents a fundraiser for scholarships supporting talented young musicians. A commanding baritone, Davis sings with a big band on a program that also includes performances by multi-instrumentalist Kyle Athayde, vocalist Clairdee and special guest drummer Greg Errico, a founding member of Sly and The Family Stone. [aside postid='arts_13951713']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One of the finest male vocalists in jazz, Davis can belt the blues, croon American Songbook ballads with a warm, burnished tone, and deliver Stevie Wonder hits with soulful authority. Born and raised in Ohio, he experienced music’s transporting power at his father’s Pentecostal church, where he first performed in the choir and then came into his own as a soloist. Always interested in a range of styles and idioms, he moved to San Francisco in the mid-1970s and established himself with top players like trumpeter Eddie Henderson and tenor saxophonist Pharoah Sanders.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v14m0fi2QSM\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Davis got his big break when word reached him indirectly that he’d been hired for the Basie Orchestra in 2000. While legendary pianist and bandleader Count Basie died in 1984, the orchestra has continued to build on its storied history as a showcase for great jazz singers, from Jimmy Rushing and Billie Holiday in the 1930s to San Francisco great Mary Stallings in the 1970s. (The orchestra just won its first Grammy, taking home the best large jazz ensemble album trophy for \u003cem>Basie Swings the Blues.\u003c/em>)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jJi3u-O4vwM\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of Clairdee and Mary Stallings, they’re both playing Keys Jazz Bistro next week. A sparking vocalist who infuses even melancholy material with a sense of optimism, Clairdee plays a run of \u003ca href=\"https://keysjazzbistro.com/event/clairdees-valentines-show/\">four Valentine’s shows Feb. 14-15\u003c/a>. And Stallings, who has established Keys as a premiere venue for vocalists with monthly appearances, \u003ca href=\"https://keysjazzbistro.com/event/mary-stallings-10/\">returns on Feb. 16-17\u003c/a>. The fact that she sounds magnificent at 81 makes it tempting to joke about her deal with the devil, but Stallings found her calling at seven years old at the First African Methodist Episcopal Zion Church on Geary Street. [aside postid='arts_13951430']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sitting in the upstairs pews looking down at a gospel choir from Chicago, “something hit me,” she told journalist Rich Scheinin in a \u003ca href=\"https://www.sfjazz.org/onthecorner/qa-with-mary-stallings\">2020 interview\u003c/a>. “You can’t separate the music from the religious aspect, the spiritual aspect. This music is a spiritual thing. I was a little girl of seven years old, and I was touched. And when I came home, I told my mother, ‘Mama, I want to be singer. I want to sing! I want to sing!’”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-12127869\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"78\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-768x75.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Martin Luther McCoy, Mary Stallings and more offer a smooth soundtrack for Valentine's Day and Black History Month.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1707354069,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":true,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":16,"wordCount":1168},"headData":{"title":"Black History and Love Intertwine at February Bay Area Concerts | KQED","description":"Martin Luther McCoy, Mary Stallings and more offer a smooth soundtrack for Valentine's Day and Black History Month.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":"","socialTitle":"Black History and Love Intertwine at February Bay Area Concerts %%page%% %%sep%% KQED","schema":{"@context":"http://schema.org","@type":"Article","headline":"Black History and Love Intertwine at These February Bay Area Concerts","datePublished":"2024-02-08T00:18:11.000Z","dateModified":"2024-02-08T01:01:09.000Z","image":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/KQED-OG-Image@1x.png"}},"sticky":false,"templateType":"standard","featuredImageType":"standard","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","articleAge":"0","path":"/arts/13951693/black-history-valentines-day-concerts-jazz-soul-sf-bay-area","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>I’m hardly the first person to note that setting aside the four weeks of February to celebrate Black history can feel a little backhanded, given that it’s shortest month of the year. But the heart of winter also contains a holiday dedicated to romance, love and eros, and too little has been made of Black History Month’s coupling with Valentine’s Day, particularly given Black music’s essential role as the soundtrack for love in all its many manifestations. \u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"arts_13925077","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>No force in American culture better evokes the jumbled, intermingled emotions, impulses and sensations we stuff into the Hermione’s handbag definition of love, which encompasses everything from carnal longing for a forbidden caress to desperate desire for unity with God. And in much the same way that classical Persian poets like Rumi and Hafez transmute spiritual ardor into the language of earthly passion, soul and R&B can transpose the ecstasy of Sunday morning worship into Saturday night revelry.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Bay Area is blessed with a multitude of artists who are eloquent in these musical love languages, like the polymathic actor, songwriter, event curator and smoldering soulman Martin Luther McCoy. He’s celebrating Feb. 14 with a tribute to Sade at the SFJAZZ Center, “\u003ca href=\"https://www.sfjazz.org/tickets/productions/23-24/martin-luther-mccoy-sade-tribute/\">No Ordinary Love\u003c/a>,” a concert in which he’ll be slipping some of his original songs into the mix. (McCoy performs another Sade tribute on March 9 at \u003ca href=\"https://blackcatsf.turntabletickets.com/\">San Francisco’s Black Cat\u003c/a>, followed by a Prince tribute on March 10.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Growing up in San Francisco, McCoy absorbed a broad sacred-to-secular spectrum of Black music, picking up Parliament from his older brother while “my parents were more into gospel and the church,” he said.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/he3DB5AqKpw'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/he3DB5AqKpw'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The McCoy household resounded with the artists who pioneered the soul aesthetic, like Dinah Washington, Ray Charles and Sam Cooke, whose classic live album \u003cem>Sam Cooke at the Copa “\u003c/em>was playing on the car tape deck every time we’d go to church,” he recalled. While Sade’s music eschews gospel’s melismatic drama in favor of lithe, cool-toned lines, McCoy brings extroverted fervor to every musical situation, whether he’s in singer-songwriter mode, accompanying himself on acoustic guitar, or belting out Sly Stone anthems with the SFJAZZ Collective. He’s releasing a new album Feb. 14, \u003cem>Welcome Back Love\u003c/em>, making his own statement about the enduring power of romantic Black music. And on March\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For suave, swoon-inducing old-school R&B, no Bay Area artist has carried the torch with more style than Nicolas Bearde, who performs at North Beach’s \u003ca href=\"https://keysjazzbistro.com/upcoming-shows/\">Keys Jazz Bistro Feb. 10\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.caltix.com/e/saturday-nicolas-bearde-valentines-special-2/tickets\">Mama Kins in San Jose\u003c/a> on Valentine’s Day and Oakland’s \u003ca href=\"https://piedmontpiano.com/calendar/2024/2/18/nicolas-bearde\">Piedmont Piano Company Feb. 18\u003c/a>. He brings a vast world of experience to the stage, from performances with Linda Tillery’s field-hollers-to-hip-hop Cultural Heritage Choir to Bobby McFerrin’s improvisation-laced a cappella Voicestra and its spin-off SoVoSó.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/jOddHmSeQ5w'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/jOddHmSeQ5w'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>As a solo artist he earned an avid following crooning sophisticated R&B, but Bearde has evolved in recent years into a captivating jazz singer whose easy-going authority on ballads and mid-tempo swingers distinguished his 2019 album \u003cem>I Remember You: The Music of Nat King Cole.\u003c/em> He notes that the marriage of church and nightclub was “somewhat controversial at first.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The AME church I went to as a young person in Nashville would never have allowed a drum kit and electric bass,” he said. “That was devil music. The only thing you’d have is piano. Not even a tambourine. But the church a block away, when that band got to thumping sometimes I wished I could have got in there. It sounded like they were having a good time.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When you’re looking for swaggering blues-drenched authority, Jamie Davis is the cat to call. He’s the headliner Feb. 17 at “\u003ca href=\"https://www.lesherartscenter.org/Home/Components/Calendar/Event/16606/3094\">Playing In the Key of Life\u003c/a>” at Walnut Creek’s Lesher Center for the Arts, where the Unity Music Foundation presents a fundraiser for scholarships supporting talented young musicians. A commanding baritone, Davis sings with a big band on a program that also includes performances by multi-instrumentalist Kyle Athayde, vocalist Clairdee and special guest drummer Greg Errico, a founding member of Sly and The Family Stone. \u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"arts_13951713","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One of the finest male vocalists in jazz, Davis can belt the blues, croon American Songbook ballads with a warm, burnished tone, and deliver Stevie Wonder hits with soulful authority. Born and raised in Ohio, he experienced music’s transporting power at his father’s Pentecostal church, where he first performed in the choir and then came into his own as a soloist. Always interested in a range of styles and idioms, he moved to San Francisco in the mid-1970s and established himself with top players like trumpeter Eddie Henderson and tenor saxophonist Pharoah Sanders.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/v14m0fi2QSM'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/v14m0fi2QSM'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Davis got his big break when word reached him indirectly that he’d been hired for the Basie Orchestra in 2000. While legendary pianist and bandleader Count Basie died in 1984, the orchestra has continued to build on its storied history as a showcase for great jazz singers, from Jimmy Rushing and Billie Holiday in the 1930s to San Francisco great Mary Stallings in the 1970s. (The orchestra just won its first Grammy, taking home the best large jazz ensemble album trophy for \u003cem>Basie Swings the Blues.\u003c/em>)\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/jJi3u-O4vwM'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/jJi3u-O4vwM'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Speaking of Clairdee and Mary Stallings, they’re both playing Keys Jazz Bistro next week. A sparking vocalist who infuses even melancholy material with a sense of optimism, Clairdee plays a run of \u003ca href=\"https://keysjazzbistro.com/event/clairdees-valentines-show/\">four Valentine’s shows Feb. 14-15\u003c/a>. And Stallings, who has established Keys as a premiere venue for vocalists with monthly appearances, \u003ca href=\"https://keysjazzbistro.com/event/mary-stallings-10/\">returns on Feb. 16-17\u003c/a>. The fact that she sounds magnificent at 81 makes it tempting to joke about her deal with the devil, but Stallings found her calling at seven years old at the First African Methodist Episcopal Zion Church on Geary Street. \u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"arts_13951430","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sitting in the upstairs pews looking down at a gospel choir from Chicago, “something hit me,” she told journalist Rich Scheinin in a \u003ca href=\"https://www.sfjazz.org/onthecorner/qa-with-mary-stallings\">2020 interview\u003c/a>. “You can’t separate the music from the religious aspect, the spiritual aspect. This music is a spiritual thing. I was a little girl of seven years old, and I was touched. And when I came home, I told my mother, ‘Mama, I want to be singer. I want to sing! I want to sing!’”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-12127869\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"78\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-768x75.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/arts/13951693/black-history-valentines-day-concerts-jazz-soul-sf-bay-area","authors":["86"],"categories":["arts_1","arts_835","arts_69"],"tags":["arts_4096","arts_10278","arts_924","arts_2048","arts_3923"],"featImg":"arts_13951784","label":"arts"},"arts_13925062":{"type":"posts","id":"arts_13925062","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"arts","id":"13925062","score":null,"sort":[1676388153000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"earnest-or-playful-your-valentines-card-has-a-history","title":"Earnest or Playful, Your Valentine’s Card Has a History","publishDate":1676388153,"format":"standard","headTitle":"Earnest or Playful, Your Valentine’s Card Has a History | KQED","labelTerm":{"site":"arts"},"content":"\u003cp>It was Valentine’s Day 1917 in the Minnesota farming village of Lewiston, and Fred Roth — a fourth grader — seems to have come up with just the way to express his love for his sweetheart, Louise Wirt. He gave her a card.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The folding, pop-up Valentine’s Day card, on stock so heavy it remains in good shape 106 years later, reads: “Forget me not!/I ask of thee/Reserve one spot/In your heart for me.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And so she did. Years later they married, and Louise displayed the cherished card, tucked into the fretwork of a bedroom dresser, for decades to come. She pointed it out to her daughter, and later to a granddaughter, me, and it remained near her bedside until her death at 91, a token of lasting love.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13925066\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13925066\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987-800x604.jpg\" alt=\"An image of pink roses and foliage surrounded by ornate paper cutouts, with a heart underneath and the illustration of an open book reading ‘Forget Me Not.’\" width=\"800\" height=\"604\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987-800x604.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987-1020x770.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987-160x121.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987-768x580.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A ‘Forget Me Not’ Valentine, circa 1860/69. Artist Thomas Wood. \u003ccite>(Heritage Art/Heritage Images via Getty Images)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Although the message was in English, the card is printed with the word “Germany” and is seemingly imported, as were many cards of that era. Small companies in the U.S. also were part of a flourishing commercial card business.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Hallmark, which began offering Valentine’s Day cards in 1913, estimates that today, 145 million Valentine’s Day cards are exchanged annually, not including the kids’ valentines popular for classroom exchanges.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fertility-related customs and rituals have been celebrated in mid-February since pagan times, says Emelie Gevalt, curator of folk art and curatorial chair for collections at the American Folk Art Museum in New York City.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='pop_109425']Tokens of affection varied: In the 1600s, the practice was to give pairs of gloves in mid-February, she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“By the 18th century, we start to see something that really begins to resemble modern Valentine’s cards,” she says. “In the 19th century, this evolved further to the point where popular ladies’ magazines like \u003cem>Harper’s Weekly\u003c/em> published instructions for readers on how to craft them.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13925064\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13925064\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962-800x580.jpg\" alt=\"A delicate collaged card featuring layers of paper with ornate cutouts. In the center is a verse titled Affection.\" width=\"800\" height=\"580\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962-800x580.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962-1020x739.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962-160x116.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962-768x557.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A Valentine circa 1855/60. Artist Thomas Wood. \u003ccite>(Heritage Art/Heritage Images via Getty Images)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>There have long been both earnest, heartfelt Valentines like Grandpa Fred’s, and ones in a more teasing, playful vein.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The museum’s collection includes a number of lovingly crafted tokens of affection from various periods. “You see the heart motif quite a lot,” Gevalt says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='pop_109337']Although not specifically linked to Valentine’s Day, an exhibit at the museum opening March 17, “Material Witness: Folk and Self-Taught Artists at Work,” features two examples of “fraktur,” exuberantly decorated watercolors made by German immigrants in Pennsylvania. One is called “Inverted Heart,” and another depicts a labyrinth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“They were really dazzling objects, including motifs of flowers or hearts. The playfulness and cleverness of these objects is one of the most interesting aspects they have in common,” Gevalt says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13925068\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13925068\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238-800x498.jpg\" alt=\"A greeting card featuring an illustrated cherub sitting in a golden carriage being pulled by white birds across a blue sky.\" width=\"800\" height=\"498\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238-800x498.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238-1020x636.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238-160x100.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238-768x479.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘To My Sweetheart,‘ a Victorian Valentine. \u003ccite>(K.J. Historical/CORBIS/Corbis via Getty Images)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>In the mid-19th century, some people shared “Vinegar Valentines,” a sort of anti-Valentine that featured playfully insulting verses, not unlike a modern-day roast.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='pop_109395']Sometimes, cards involved writing in a circle or upside down, like a puzzle. Some had a decorative folded border or verses on the folds; cutwork resembling lace; or watercolor decorations of pierced hearts, lovebirds and flowers. Lover’s knots and labyrinths were also common elements.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“They remind me of games, like plucking the petals of a flower saying ‘she loves me, she loves me not,’” Gevalt says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The boom in commercial Valentine’s Day cards in the mid-1800s was a reflection of changing courtship patterns, says Elizabeth White Nelson, associate professor of history at University of Nevada, Las Vegas.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The idea of companionate marriage and love became a part of the calculus of marriage, and Valentine’s Day cards became a part of courtship,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13925069\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13925069\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155-800x534.jpg\" alt=\"A cardboard cherub sits in a cardboard model of a biplane. \" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">An antique 3-D Valentine owned by John Dodge, who owns 1,400 antique Valentines. \u003ccite>(Tom Landers/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>These days, the cards continue to evolve.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Over the last few years, trends have been less about romantic love but more about letting someone know they matter,” says Jen Walker, vice president of trends and creative studios at Hallmark Cards, Inc.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>There are “more inclusive visuals, and a larger representation of relationships — love, chosen family, friendships, parents and children, self-care,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='pop_20463']A bit of mystery surrounds my Grandma Louise’s precious Valentine. It would have been out of character for Fred to buy a commercial card as opposed to, say, presenting her with a bouquet of pussy willows he had picked.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“That period would have been the beginning of an organized practice of exchanging Valentines in school,” says Nelson. In some classrooms, everyone was required, or at least encouraged, to give a Valentine.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The giving and receiving of Valentines was always partly about performing love, for an audience,” says Nelson, “and once that Valentine’s Day card got saved, it would have become a talisman of all that love is supposed to be.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Copyright 2023 AP. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://apnews.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">the AP\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Hallmark began offering Valentine’s Day cards in 1913, but their history dates back much further than that.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1705005849,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":26,"wordCount":914},"headData":{"title":"Valentine’s Day Cards: A Brief History | KQED","description":"Hallmark began offering Valentine’s Day cards in 1913, but their history dates back much further than that.","ogTitle":"Earnest or Playful, Your Valentine’s Card Has a History","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"Earnest or Playful, Your Valentine’s Card Has a History","twDescription":"","twImgId":"","socialTitle":"Valentine’s Day Cards: A Brief History %%page%% %%sep%% KQED","schema":{"@context":"http://schema.org","@type":"Article","headline":"Earnest or Playful, Your Valentine’s Card Has a History","datePublished":"2023-02-14T15:22:33.000Z","dateModified":"2024-01-11T20:44:09.000Z","image":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/KQED-OG-Image@1x.png"}},"sticky":false,"nprByline":"Katherine Roth","templateType":"standard","featuredImageType":"standard","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","showOnAuthorArchivePages":"No","articleAge":"0","path":"/arts/13925062/earnest-or-playful-your-valentines-card-has-a-history","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>It was Valentine’s Day 1917 in the Minnesota farming village of Lewiston, and Fred Roth — a fourth grader — seems to have come up with just the way to express his love for his sweetheart, Louise Wirt. He gave her a card.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The folding, pop-up Valentine’s Day card, on stock so heavy it remains in good shape 106 years later, reads: “Forget me not!/I ask of thee/Reserve one spot/In your heart for me.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And so she did. Years later they married, and Louise displayed the cherished card, tucked into the fretwork of a bedroom dresser, for decades to come. She pointed it out to her daughter, and later to a granddaughter, me, and it remained near her bedside until her death at 91, a token of lasting love.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13925066\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13925066\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987-800x604.jpg\" alt=\"An image of pink roses and foliage surrounded by ornate paper cutouts, with a heart underneath and the illustration of an open book reading ‘Forget Me Not.’\" width=\"800\" height=\"604\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987-800x604.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987-1020x770.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987-160x121.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987-768x580.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723987.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A ‘Forget Me Not’ Valentine, circa 1860/69. Artist Thomas Wood. \u003ccite>(Heritage Art/Heritage Images via Getty Images)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Although the message was in English, the card is printed with the word “Germany” and is seemingly imported, as were many cards of that era. Small companies in the U.S. also were part of a flourishing commercial card business.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Hallmark, which began offering Valentine’s Day cards in 1913, estimates that today, 145 million Valentine’s Day cards are exchanged annually, not including the kids’ valentines popular for classroom exchanges.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fertility-related customs and rituals have been celebrated in mid-February since pagan times, says Emelie Gevalt, curator of folk art and curatorial chair for collections at the American Folk Art Museum in New York City.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"pop_109425","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>Tokens of affection varied: In the 1600s, the practice was to give pairs of gloves in mid-February, she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“By the 18th century, we start to see something that really begins to resemble modern Valentine’s cards,” she says. “In the 19th century, this evolved further to the point where popular ladies’ magazines like \u003cem>Harper’s Weekly\u003c/em> published instructions for readers on how to craft them.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13925064\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13925064\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962-800x580.jpg\" alt=\"A delicate collaged card featuring layers of paper with ornate cutouts. In the center is a verse titled Affection.\" width=\"800\" height=\"580\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962-800x580.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962-1020x739.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962-160x116.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962-768x557.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-1365723962.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A Valentine circa 1855/60. Artist Thomas Wood. \u003ccite>(Heritage Art/Heritage Images via Getty Images)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>There have long been both earnest, heartfelt Valentines like Grandpa Fred’s, and ones in a more teasing, playful vein.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The museum’s collection includes a number of lovingly crafted tokens of affection from various periods. “You see the heart motif quite a lot,” Gevalt says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"pop_109337","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>Although not specifically linked to Valentine’s Day, an exhibit at the museum opening March 17, “Material Witness: Folk and Self-Taught Artists at Work,” features two examples of “fraktur,” exuberantly decorated watercolors made by German immigrants in Pennsylvania. One is called “Inverted Heart,” and another depicts a labyrinth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“They were really dazzling objects, including motifs of flowers or hearts. The playfulness and cleverness of these objects is one of the most interesting aspects they have in common,” Gevalt says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13925068\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13925068\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238-800x498.jpg\" alt=\"A greeting card featuring an illustrated cherub sitting in a golden carriage being pulled by white birds across a blue sky.\" width=\"800\" height=\"498\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238-800x498.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238-1020x636.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238-160x100.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238-768x479.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-524478238.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">‘To My Sweetheart,‘ a Victorian Valentine. \u003ccite>(K.J. Historical/CORBIS/Corbis via Getty Images)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>In the mid-19th century, some people shared “Vinegar Valentines,” a sort of anti-Valentine that featured playfully insulting verses, not unlike a modern-day roast.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"pop_109395","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>Sometimes, cards involved writing in a circle or upside down, like a puzzle. Some had a decorative folded border or verses on the folds; cutwork resembling lace; or watercolor decorations of pierced hearts, lovebirds and flowers. Lover’s knots and labyrinths were also common elements.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“They remind me of games, like plucking the petals of a flower saying ‘she loves me, she loves me not,’” Gevalt says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The boom in commercial Valentine’s Day cards in the mid-1800s was a reflection of changing courtship patterns, says Elizabeth White Nelson, associate professor of history at University of Nevada, Las Vegas.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The idea of companionate marriage and love became a part of the calculus of marriage, and Valentine’s Day cards became a part of courtship,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13925069\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13925069\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155-800x534.jpg\" alt=\"A cardboard cherub sits in a cardboard model of a biplane. \" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/02/GettyImages-137665155.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">An antique 3-D Valentine owned by John Dodge, who owns 1,400 antique Valentines. \u003ccite>(Tom Landers/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>These days, the cards continue to evolve.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Over the last few years, trends have been less about romantic love but more about letting someone know they matter,” says Jen Walker, vice president of trends and creative studios at Hallmark Cards, Inc.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>There are “more inclusive visuals, and a larger representation of relationships — love, chosen family, friendships, parents and children, self-care,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"pop_20463","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>A bit of mystery surrounds my Grandma Louise’s precious Valentine. It would have been out of character for Fred to buy a commercial card as opposed to, say, presenting her with a bouquet of pussy willows he had picked.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“That period would have been the beginning of an organized practice of exchanging Valentines in school,” says Nelson. In some classrooms, everyone was required, or at least encouraged, to give a Valentine.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The giving and receiving of Valentines was always partly about performing love, for an audience,” says Nelson, “and once that Valentine’s Day card got saved, it would have become a talisman of all that love is supposed to be.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Copyright 2023 AP. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://apnews.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">the AP\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/arts/13925062/earnest-or-playful-your-valentines-card-has-a-history","authors":["byline_arts_13925062"],"categories":["arts_1","arts_835","arts_7862"],"tags":["arts_3923"],"featImg":"arts_13925063","label":"arts"},"arts_13925077":{"type":"posts","id":"arts_13925077","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"arts","id":"13925077","score":null,"sort":[1676336556000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"mystic-additional-love-black-history-month","title":"Why Hip-Hop Artist Mystic is Devoting February to Revolutionary Love","publishDate":1676336556,"format":"aside","headTitle":"Why Hip-Hop Artist Mystic is Devoting February to Revolutionary Love | KQED","labelTerm":{"site":"arts"},"content":"\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13906481\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13906481\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-800x450.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-800x450.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-160x90.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-768x432.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-1536x864.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">This month, hip-hop artist, educator and activist Mystic is making playlists, hosting discussions and dropping verses about the power of love. \u003ccite>(Nastia Voynovskaya/KQED)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Oakland hip-hop artist \u003ca href=\"https://mysticworldwide.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Mystic\u003c/a> is a deep thinker about many issues — the environment, social justice and healing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But connecting her activism, education work and art is love.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Love is revolutionary,” said the Grammy-nominated artist and Oxford-educated community activist. “The only way that I believe that we can move forward is as a collective and grounded in love.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So as folks are likely thinking more about this on Valentine’s Day, Mystic has been running a programming series called Additional Love Month, and tying this in with what she calls Additional Black History Month in February.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The world is in need of more love, and I want to help with that,” she said on \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/reel/CoIRS6WDBRN/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Instagram\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In trying to uplift and celebrate love in all its forms, Mystic has been \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/CoVeo72obV-/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">hosting discussions\u003c/a>, and posting love notes and verse performances of her own songs on Instagram. She has also been \u003ca href=\"https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0HukqjZNH1u8qhry063lsS?si=7NhOuP3wRT2VhPf80eI80w&nd=1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">curating a playlist\u003c/a> with contributions from her family, friends and collaborators.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She talked more about this with KQED morning host Brian Watt. [aside postid='arts_13906176']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This interview has been edited for length and clarity.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>BRIAN WATT:\u003c/strong> This celebration of Additional Love Month is inspired in part by your latest work, which draws on the writings of bell hooks. Tell me more about that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>MYSTIC:\u003c/strong> [My album] \u003cem>Dreaming in Cursive: The Girl Who Loved Sparklers\u003c/em> is what I call my healed Black woman music. When I first started creating hip-hop, when I was 16, I was, what I call, a broken Black girl, having experienced sexual assault and just the kind of in and outs of daily life in the ’90s in Oakland. With this album, I was really intentional about wanting to create art and sound and visuals that are about affirmation, that are about love.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And so bell hooks, in her book \u003cem>All About Love\u003c/em>, which I encourage everyone to read multiple times across our lifetimes, it’s deeply striking to me because she’s exploring and examining love in a variety of different contexts, using her personal experiences, but also focusing on community, spirituality, on the connections between us. And even in the first chapter on clarity, she’s talking about our need to collectively define what does love mean. Love is nurturing and care, and it is in opposition to harm and to exploitation.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://youtu.be/oOWb6An8pXg\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>My producer told me you almost called the album \u003cem>Love Songs\u003c/em>.\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I wanted to call it that because every single song on the album is a love song, and whether it’s romantic or [like] in the song, “Here Alive,” I start off talking to young people and children around the world who may be living in slums, who are living lives in which we are often not valorized as people of color. And then I go on to speak to men and folks who are incarcerated, and then I go on and speak to my sisters and to women who have been oppressed and violated in the world.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But in saying “Here, Alive,” we need you here, alive, keep pushing on, it’s about that love that collectively we can move through this world in love with each other.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe loading=\"lazy\" style=\"border: 0; width: 100%; height: 120px;\" src=\"https://bandcamp.com/EmbeddedPlayer/album=1909652176/size=large/bgcol=ffffff/linkcol=0687f5/tracklist=false/artwork=small/track=3117910548/transparent=true/\" width=\"100%\" height=\"500\" scrolling=\"yes\" class=\"iframe-class\" frameborder=\"0\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>So what is it about the experience of writing love songs?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I don’t think about them necessarily as far as love songs. They’re all love songs, right? But depending on what I’m writing, I’m not necessarily sitting down and going, okay, I’m going to write a romantic love song right now, or I’m going to write a love song for children or for the planet. And very often, as you said, these things are kind of mixed together in one piece of one piece of art. But, you know, I listen to the music, the production, and what does the music touch in my heart and in my spirit that opens up that story within me that needs to be told.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>You grew up in Oakland. You live there now. What has the city taught you about love and how has it influenced your music?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>My mother moved me to Oakland [in] ninth grade, summer. I was exposed to this really profound depth of sociopolitical thought that is a running thread in the community of Oakland, where the Black Panthers and others took it upon themselves to try to feed our communities and liberate our people and liberate our communities. That’s love. Love is liberation, right?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oakland taught me what it means to be devoted to your community, to be devoted to the alliances that can be made across physical borders of neighborhoods and ethnicities and races, and that we can be together. And there’s this feeling in Oakland, too, because so many families migrated from the South that is kind of like this relaxed, soothing place to be with this thriving, thriving life. And so it just it continues to inspire me everyday because there’s also such deep inequality.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It was also a beautiful time in hip-hop in Oakland. We were creating culture. At this time, we’ve got Souls of Mischief, we’ve got E-40 and The Click, and independent labels. A-plus from Souls of Mischief, his mom lived across the street from my mom, so I got to come up with Hieroglyphics and learn to freestyle with them. [aside postid='arts_13923938']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At that time in my life, art saved my life.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>You have also asked people to give you suggestions on love songs as part of your \u003ca href=\"https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0HukqjZNH1u8qhry063lsS?si=7NhOuP3wRT2VhPf80eI80w&nd=1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Additional Love Month playlist\u003c/a>. What are some of the tracks that stand out to you?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I got sent some Beethoven. I got sent a lot of Sade “Cherish the Day.” But the range! It’s jazz, it’s country, it’s classical, it’s hip-hop, it’s soul. I’ve been really surprised by who sent me what — like hip-hop artists sent me country songs.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Questlove sent me over some playlists that I could pull songs from. My momma, my cousin, my brother, all of those folks added in the songs as well. So I’m delighted. And just like Additional Love Month is going to be every month of February from this year going forward. I will do one of these collective playlists every year.\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"To celebrate the healing power of love, she's hosting discussions, dropping verses and curating playlists.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1705005850,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":true,"iframeSrcs":["https://bandcamp.com/EmbeddedPlayer/album=1909652176/size=large/bgcol=ffffff/linkcol=0687f5/tracklist=false/artwork=small/track=3117910548/transparent=true/"],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":27,"wordCount":1120},"headData":{"title":"Why Hip-Hop Artist Mystic is Devoting February to Revolutionary Love | KQED","description":"To celebrate the healing power of love, she's hosting discussions, dropping verses and curating playlists.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":"","schema":{"@context":"http://schema.org","@type":"Article","headline":"Why Hip-Hop Artist Mystic is Devoting February to Revolutionary Love","datePublished":"2023-02-14T01:02:36.000Z","dateModified":"2024-01-11T20:44:10.000Z","image":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/KQED-OG-Image@1x.png"}},"audioUrl":"https://traffic.omny.fm/d/clips/0af137ef-751e-4b19-a055-aaef00d2d578/ffca7e9f-6831-41c5-bcaf-aaef00f5a073/8cc0681a-6e3f-441a-b67e-afa901414633/audio.mp3","sticky":false,"templateType":"standard","featuredImageType":"standard","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","articleAge":"0","path":"/arts/13925077/mystic-additional-love-black-history-month","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13906481\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13906481\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-800x450.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-800x450.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-160x90.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-768x432.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2-1536x864.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/11/Mystic-2.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">This month, hip-hop artist, educator and activist Mystic is making playlists, hosting discussions and dropping verses about the power of love. \u003ccite>(Nastia Voynovskaya/KQED)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Oakland hip-hop artist \u003ca href=\"https://mysticworldwide.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Mystic\u003c/a> is a deep thinker about many issues — the environment, social justice and healing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But connecting her activism, education work and art is love.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Love is revolutionary,” said the Grammy-nominated artist and Oxford-educated community activist. “The only way that I believe that we can move forward is as a collective and grounded in love.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So as folks are likely thinking more about this on Valentine’s Day, Mystic has been running a programming series called Additional Love Month, and tying this in with what she calls Additional Black History Month in February.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The world is in need of more love, and I want to help with that,” she said on \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/reel/CoIRS6WDBRN/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Instagram\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In trying to uplift and celebrate love in all its forms, Mystic has been \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/CoVeo72obV-/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">hosting discussions\u003c/a>, and posting love notes and verse performances of her own songs on Instagram. She has also been \u003ca href=\"https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0HukqjZNH1u8qhry063lsS?si=7NhOuP3wRT2VhPf80eI80w&nd=1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">curating a playlist\u003c/a> with contributions from her family, friends and collaborators.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She talked more about this with KQED morning host Brian Watt. \u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"arts_13906176","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This interview has been edited for length and clarity.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>BRIAN WATT:\u003c/strong> This celebration of Additional Love Month is inspired in part by your latest work, which draws on the writings of bell hooks. Tell me more about that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>MYSTIC:\u003c/strong> [My album] \u003cem>Dreaming in Cursive: The Girl Who Loved Sparklers\u003c/em> is what I call my healed Black woman music. When I first started creating hip-hop, when I was 16, I was, what I call, a broken Black girl, having experienced sexual assault and just the kind of in and outs of daily life in the ’90s in Oakland. With this album, I was really intentional about wanting to create art and sound and visuals that are about affirmation, that are about love.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And so bell hooks, in her book \u003cem>All About Love\u003c/em>, which I encourage everyone to read multiple times across our lifetimes, it’s deeply striking to me because she’s exploring and examining love in a variety of different contexts, using her personal experiences, but also focusing on community, spirituality, on the connections between us. And even in the first chapter on clarity, she’s talking about our need to collectively define what does love mean. Love is nurturing and care, and it is in opposition to harm and to exploitation.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/oOWb6An8pXg'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/oOWb6An8pXg'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cstrong>My producer told me you almost called the album \u003cem>Love Songs\u003c/em>.\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I wanted to call it that because every single song on the album is a love song, and whether it’s romantic or [like] in the song, “Here Alive,” I start off talking to young people and children around the world who may be living in slums, who are living lives in which we are often not valorized as people of color. And then I go on to speak to men and folks who are incarcerated, and then I go on and speak to my sisters and to women who have been oppressed and violated in the world.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But in saying “Here, Alive,” we need you here, alive, keep pushing on, it’s about that love that collectively we can move through this world in love with each other.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe loading=\"lazy\" style=\"border: 0; width: 100%; height: 120px;\" src=\"https://bandcamp.com/EmbeddedPlayer/album=1909652176/size=large/bgcol=ffffff/linkcol=0687f5/tracklist=false/artwork=small/track=3117910548/transparent=true/\" width=\"100%\" height=\"500\" scrolling=\"yes\" class=\"iframe-class\" frameborder=\"0\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>So what is it about the experience of writing love songs?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I don’t think about them necessarily as far as love songs. They’re all love songs, right? But depending on what I’m writing, I’m not necessarily sitting down and going, okay, I’m going to write a romantic love song right now, or I’m going to write a love song for children or for the planet. And very often, as you said, these things are kind of mixed together in one piece of one piece of art. But, you know, I listen to the music, the production, and what does the music touch in my heart and in my spirit that opens up that story within me that needs to be told.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>You grew up in Oakland. You live there now. What has the city taught you about love and how has it influenced your music?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>My mother moved me to Oakland [in] ninth grade, summer. I was exposed to this really profound depth of sociopolitical thought that is a running thread in the community of Oakland, where the Black Panthers and others took it upon themselves to try to feed our communities and liberate our people and liberate our communities. That’s love. Love is liberation, right?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oakland taught me what it means to be devoted to your community, to be devoted to the alliances that can be made across physical borders of neighborhoods and ethnicities and races, and that we can be together. And there’s this feeling in Oakland, too, because so many families migrated from the South that is kind of like this relaxed, soothing place to be with this thriving, thriving life. And so it just it continues to inspire me everyday because there’s also such deep inequality.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It was also a beautiful time in hip-hop in Oakland. We were creating culture. At this time, we’ve got Souls of Mischief, we’ve got E-40 and The Click, and independent labels. A-plus from Souls of Mischief, his mom lived across the street from my mom, so I got to come up with Hieroglyphics and learn to freestyle with them. \u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"arts_13923938","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At that time in my life, art saved my life.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>You have also asked people to give you suggestions on love songs as part of your \u003ca href=\"https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0HukqjZNH1u8qhry063lsS?si=7NhOuP3wRT2VhPf80eI80w&nd=1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Additional Love Month playlist\u003c/a>. What are some of the tracks that stand out to you?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I got sent some Beethoven. I got sent a lot of Sade “Cherish the Day.” But the range! It’s jazz, it’s country, it’s classical, it’s hip-hop, it’s soul. I’ve been really surprised by who sent me what — like hip-hop artists sent me country songs.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Questlove sent me over some playlists that I could pull songs from. My momma, my cousin, my brother, all of those folks added in the songs as well. So I’m delighted. And just like Additional Love Month is going to be every month of February from this year going forward. I will do one of these collective playlists every year.\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/arts/13925077/mystic-additional-love-black-history-month","authors":["11238","11724"],"categories":["arts_69"],"tags":["arts_4096","arts_10278","arts_3931","arts_3477","arts_3923"],"featImg":"arts_13906481","label":"arts"},"arts_13924946":{"type":"posts","id":"arts_13924946","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"arts","id":"13924946","score":null,"sort":[1676313342000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"are-we-using-self-care-as-a-way-out-of-relationships","title":"Are We Using 'Self-Care' as a Way Out of Relationships?","publishDate":1676313342,"format":"standard","headTitle":"Are We Using ‘Self-Care’ as a Way Out of Relationships? | KQED","labelTerm":{"site":"arts"},"content":"\u003cp>\u003cem>The silence is killing me,\u003c/em> I thought as I locked my phone, hoping a new message notification would light up the screen. After roughly 27 messages, two phone calls and a voicemail, I’d just sent my final text to the person who used to be my best friend at UC Berkeley.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The two of us met freshman year and — since we were enrolled in almost all the same core classes — rapidly became inseparable throughout college: we routinely pulled 5 a.m. nights studying, were each other’s go-to for late-night pizza runs, and drove back to LA together almost every holiday break.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then one day after graduation, he suddenly stopped responding, aside from claiming he “didn’t have enough time for himself.” That breakup, although platonic, was the most painful I’ve experienced: After four years of building such a close relationship, I thought I’d at least receive an explanation for why he wanted to end things. Instead, I received only a curt, indirect message about self-care and — what hurt me the most — an overwhelming silence.[aside label=\"Related Stories\" postID=\"arts_13824351\"]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over the past few years, the concept of “\u003ca href=\"https://www.vogue.com/article/practical-ways-to-set-boundaries-and-stick-to-them-in-2022\">drawing boundaries\u003c/a>” has exploded in the pop psychology lexicon. Discussions of \u003ca href=\"https://www.tiktok.com/@ms.maryanndd/video/7138738319621491994?is_from_webapp=v1&item_id=7138738319621491994\">cutting people off\u003c/a>, “\u003ca href=\"https://www.tiktok.com/@robothighway/video/7170905834518514986?q=protect%20your%20energy%20cut%20people%20off&t=1675906929458\">protecting your energy\u003c/a>” and even \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/J5GoCrazy/status/1513548873456881667?s=20&t=_n3cdh8CfP6Vl2PUxGznHw\">ghosting\u003c/a> as forms of self-care consistently dominate social media. And after nearly three years in isolation, the ways the pandemic has spurred many of us to reevaluate our relationships with others — and reclaim time for ourselves — show up everywhere in pop culture.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The \u003ca href=\"https://www.everydayhealth.com/self-care/\">benefits of self-care\u003c/a> are fairly obvious: by prioritizing our own well-being, we’re able to engage in emotional healing, build confidence, reduce anxiety and simply rest. But at the same time, an extreme focus on self-care can lead to a distorted perspective of the world in which we always put ourselves first — even when we’re in the wrong. This narcissistic interpretation of self-care doesn’t just hurt us — it can have real, painful consequences for the people around us.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“What’s interesting about the popularization of terms [like ‘boundaries’] that have always been used in therapy is that they actually become a way to use unhelpful coping skills,” explains Elizabeth Earnshaw, a licensed marriage and family therapist who runs the popular Instagram page \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/lizlistens/\">@LizListens\u003c/a>. “Boundaries are actually about understanding yourself: what you’re OK with and not OK with. Knowing when you can be flexible and when you can’t.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“But I think that people who are hyper-independent and avoidant will sometimes use the term as a way to describe how they’re keeping people out,” says Earnshaw. “It promotes this idea that it’s OK for me to stay really distant, and to maybe not be as vulnerable with people I care about.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.instagram.com/p/CobDc4tMhty/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Building self-awareness is undeniably crucial to improving our relationships, but in many cases, it’s just the first step: We also need to be able to address our unhealthy patterns and engage in uncomfortable conversations in order to take action. For relationship coach \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/hotlinefab/\">Fabiola Wong\u003c/a>, communication and action are key to her practice. She structures her courses around covering mindset, letting go of past baggage and building confidence. Wong also offers a special hotline for existing clients where they can text her at any time Monday through Friday, 9 a.m. to 7 p.m., asking for advice, a pep talk or even help responding to or analyzing a text.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I help my clients understand what their toxic patterns and weaknesses are, and help them understand who they are and feel grounded,” Wong explains. A lot of her work revolves around the importance of setting boundaries in a healthy, flexible manner, and having the kindness and compassion to communicate them with your partner. “Boundaries are like the promises you make to yourself. When you break your own boundary, that’s when you start to feel resentful.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Unsurprisingly, she says, navigating the balance between your own boundaries and the needs of others comes down to communication — especially in moments of conflict. While conflict and compromise might have negative connotations in our extreme self-care world, they’re also inevitable: “Research has shown that, in our relationships, the majority of our problems are actually not solvable. There’s going to be continued perpetual conflict around specific areas,” Earnshaw explains. For example, if one person in a relationship is always a busy go-getter by nature, but the other likes to relax and decompress, that couple would need to find a middle ground that works for them.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I think conflict is normal and natural. But what really makes conflict difficult for people is when we’re unwilling to let go of being right. It’s like, you can either be right or you can be loved,” says Wong. “But what actually will define whether a relationship will thrive is how quickly you can resolve conflict and whether or not it’s actually resolved.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Even though it can sometimes feel easier for us to remove ourselves from conflict or discomfort under the guise of self-care, walking away from these relationships without a real conversation — in situations where it’s safe to do so — actually robs us and our loved ones of an opportunity for growth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To this day, I still think of my college best friend, wondering what exactly went wrong and whether or not I could’ve fixed the situation if given the chance. Earnshaw puts it best: “I think that if we want to be people who are in relationships with other people, we have a responsibility towards them. It’s the kindest, maybe most emotionally vulnerable or mature thing to do to let someone know — even if very briefly — that we’re not going to be in contact anymore. And I think we’ve been convinced in this hyper-individualized world that we don’t owe anyone an explanation for anything.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Boundaries are important, but experts say navigating conflict is just as crucial.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1705005852,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":15,"wordCount":1067},"headData":{"title":"Are We Using 'Self-Care' as a Way Out of Relationships? | KQED","description":"Boundaries are important, but experts say navigating conflict is just as crucial.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":"","schema":{"@context":"http://schema.org","@type":"Article","headline":"Are We Using 'Self-Care' as a Way Out of Relationships?","datePublished":"2023-02-13T18:35:42.000Z","dateModified":"2024-01-11T20:44:12.000Z","image":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/KQED-OG-Image@1x.png"}},"sticky":false,"templateType":"standard","featuredImageType":"standard","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","articleAge":"0","path":"/arts/13924946/are-we-using-self-care-as-a-way-out-of-relationships","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cem>The silence is killing me,\u003c/em> I thought as I locked my phone, hoping a new message notification would light up the screen. After roughly 27 messages, two phone calls and a voicemail, I’d just sent my final text to the person who used to be my best friend at UC Berkeley.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The two of us met freshman year and — since we were enrolled in almost all the same core classes — rapidly became inseparable throughout college: we routinely pulled 5 a.m. nights studying, were each other’s go-to for late-night pizza runs, and drove back to LA together almost every holiday break.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then one day after graduation, he suddenly stopped responding, aside from claiming he “didn’t have enough time for himself.” That breakup, although platonic, was the most painful I’ve experienced: After four years of building such a close relationship, I thought I’d at least receive an explanation for why he wanted to end things. Instead, I received only a curt, indirect message about self-care and — what hurt me the most — an overwhelming silence.\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"label":"Related Stories ","postid":"arts_13824351"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over the past few years, the concept of “\u003ca href=\"https://www.vogue.com/article/practical-ways-to-set-boundaries-and-stick-to-them-in-2022\">drawing boundaries\u003c/a>” has exploded in the pop psychology lexicon. Discussions of \u003ca href=\"https://www.tiktok.com/@ms.maryanndd/video/7138738319621491994?is_from_webapp=v1&item_id=7138738319621491994\">cutting people off\u003c/a>, “\u003ca href=\"https://www.tiktok.com/@robothighway/video/7170905834518514986?q=protect%20your%20energy%20cut%20people%20off&t=1675906929458\">protecting your energy\u003c/a>” and even \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/J5GoCrazy/status/1513548873456881667?s=20&t=_n3cdh8CfP6Vl2PUxGznHw\">ghosting\u003c/a> as forms of self-care consistently dominate social media. And after nearly three years in isolation, the ways the pandemic has spurred many of us to reevaluate our relationships with others — and reclaim time for ourselves — show up everywhere in pop culture.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The \u003ca href=\"https://www.everydayhealth.com/self-care/\">benefits of self-care\u003c/a> are fairly obvious: by prioritizing our own well-being, we’re able to engage in emotional healing, build confidence, reduce anxiety and simply rest. But at the same time, an extreme focus on self-care can lead to a distorted perspective of the world in which we always put ourselves first — even when we’re in the wrong. This narcissistic interpretation of self-care doesn’t just hurt us — it can have real, painful consequences for the people around us.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“What’s interesting about the popularization of terms [like ‘boundaries’] that have always been used in therapy is that they actually become a way to use unhelpful coping skills,” explains Elizabeth Earnshaw, a licensed marriage and family therapist who runs the popular Instagram page \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/lizlistens/\">@LizListens\u003c/a>. “Boundaries are actually about understanding yourself: what you’re OK with and not OK with. Knowing when you can be flexible and when you can’t.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“But I think that people who are hyper-independent and avoidant will sometimes use the term as a way to describe how they’re keeping people out,” says Earnshaw. “It promotes this idea that it’s OK for me to stay really distant, and to maybe not be as vulnerable with people I care about.”\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"instagramLink","attributes":{"named":{"instagramId":"CobDc4tMhty"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Building self-awareness is undeniably crucial to improving our relationships, but in many cases, it’s just the first step: We also need to be able to address our unhealthy patterns and engage in uncomfortable conversations in order to take action. For relationship coach \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/hotlinefab/\">Fabiola Wong\u003c/a>, communication and action are key to her practice. She structures her courses around covering mindset, letting go of past baggage and building confidence. Wong also offers a special hotline for existing clients where they can text her at any time Monday through Friday, 9 a.m. to 7 p.m., asking for advice, a pep talk or even help responding to or analyzing a text.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I help my clients understand what their toxic patterns and weaknesses are, and help them understand who they are and feel grounded,” Wong explains. A lot of her work revolves around the importance of setting boundaries in a healthy, flexible manner, and having the kindness and compassion to communicate them with your partner. “Boundaries are like the promises you make to yourself. When you break your own boundary, that’s when you start to feel resentful.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Unsurprisingly, she says, navigating the balance between your own boundaries and the needs of others comes down to communication — especially in moments of conflict. While conflict and compromise might have negative connotations in our extreme self-care world, they’re also inevitable: “Research has shown that, in our relationships, the majority of our problems are actually not solvable. There’s going to be continued perpetual conflict around specific areas,” Earnshaw explains. For example, if one person in a relationship is always a busy go-getter by nature, but the other likes to relax and decompress, that couple would need to find a middle ground that works for them.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I think conflict is normal and natural. But what really makes conflict difficult for people is when we’re unwilling to let go of being right. It’s like, you can either be right or you can be loved,” says Wong. “But what actually will define whether a relationship will thrive is how quickly you can resolve conflict and whether or not it’s actually resolved.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Even though it can sometimes feel easier for us to remove ourselves from conflict or discomfort under the guise of self-care, walking away from these relationships without a real conversation — in situations where it’s safe to do so — actually robs us and our loved ones of an opportunity for growth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To this day, I still think of my college best friend, wondering what exactly went wrong and whether or not I could’ve fixed the situation if given the chance. Earnshaw puts it best: “I think that if we want to be people who are in relationships with other people, we have a responsibility towards them. It’s the kindest, maybe most emotionally vulnerable or mature thing to do to let someone know — even if very briefly — that we’re not going to be in contact anymore. And I think we’ve been convinced in this hyper-individualized world that we don’t owe anyone an explanation for anything.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/arts/13924946/are-we-using-self-care-as-a-way-out-of-relationships","authors":["11391"],"categories":["arts_1","arts_2303","arts_835"],"tags":["arts_10278","arts_9599","arts_9581","arts_3923"],"featImg":"arts_13925039","label":"arts"},"arts_13909414":{"type":"posts","id":"arts_13909414","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"arts","id":"13909414","score":null,"sort":[1644879035000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"federico-ardila-may-li-khoe","title":"How a Mathematician and a Designer Ignite Each Other’s Creative Spark","publishDate":1644879035,"format":"standard","headTitle":"How a Mathematician and a Designer Ignite Each Other’s Creative Spark | KQED","labelTerm":{"site":"arts"},"content":"\u003cp>[dropcap]W[/dropcap]hen thinking about the partnership between \u003ca href=\"http://math.sfsu.edu/federico/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Federico Ardila\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"http://www.maylikhoe.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">May-Li Khoe\u003c/a>, you could imagine how design and mathematics intersect and strengthen one another, much like these two creatives do in their careers and lives. That’s what we talked about at first when they invited me over to their home in San Francisco’s Mission District, where we enjoyed afternoon arepas and some cafecito.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For the couple, mathematics, design, art and music are just languages they have a fluency in—pathways to explore, improvise, and have fun.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At San Francisco State University, Ardila researches and teaches mathematics, with a focus in combinatorial theory and geometry. He is a leading advocate for the creation of \u003ca href=\"https://www.ams.org/publications/journals/notices/201610/rnoti-p1164.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">principles and practices that make math more human\u003c/a>, for understanding our biases and making space for people of color and non-binary folks to think of ourselves as mathematicians. He and Khoe are both DJs and musicians. And Khoe is also a designer, start-up founder and dancer currently pursuing her MFA in creative writing, also at San Francisco State.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Most of what I do in math, [May-Li] does in design,” Ardila says. But when they do work and collaborate together, “we do it in learning and mutual construction.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Khoe ended up pursuing undergraduate and master’s degrees in computer science and engineering at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (she was one class short of a math major). And Ardila went all the way from an undergraduate degree to a PhD in mathematics.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Traditional mathematics sometimes feels too rigid for Ardila. He says that he’s gotten more interested in forms that communicate that value of flexibility, such as what Khoe does with interaction design, which feels more like jazz music: it’s about improvisation and the experience. But Khoe thinks that math is improvisational, artistic and creative, too. Ardila agrees: math needs you to give up control, he says, to see “what can happen, what can work.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Khoe is Chinese-Indonesian and was born in the Netherlands. She’s also a twice immigrant, first to Canada and then to the United States. Ardila is a first generation immigrant to the U.S. from Colombia. (And a Bogotano, like me.) [aside postid='arts_13909254']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Khoe has an impressive design resume. At Apple, where she spent seven years, she worked on some of the first mobile apps, and helped develop newer features such as Touch Force and Taptic Engine. At the nonprofit Khan Academy, where she was until 2019, she worked her way up to vice president of design. She also co-founded two collaboration software companies, \u003ca href=\"https://scribbletogether.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Scribble\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://sprout.place/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Sprout\u003c/a>. She has also taught design classes and given talks at Carnegie Mellon University and Harvard University, to name a few.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>During the pandemic, Khoe began her masters program in creative writing after she and Ardila went on sabbatical to Colombia. There, she started writing a \u003ca href=\"https://tinyletter.com/mayli/letters/loss-hope-and-the-spaces-between\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">small travel newsletter\u003c/a> that she shared with friends and family. People told her they loved the way she saw things, and that’s when she decided to go for it and enroll in SFSU. Although she started with a focus on nonfiction, she’s interested in many forms, in genre-breaking narratives, and integrating the personal and the global to “write in a way that resonates with people’s hearts and also surprises or expands their minds.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I have found opportunities to see things in different ways, from the peripheries and the edges of things, which I enjoy doing,” she says of her work across different disciplines.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Those lessons also happen in her marriage with Ardila: how they relate, how they show care in conversations, how they see each other as intellectual equals—and artistic ones, too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13909424\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13909424\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"Federico Ardila and May-Li Khoe play percussion instruments in a restaurant parklet in San Francisco.\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-800x533.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-1020x679.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-1536x1023.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Neblinas del Pacífico perform at Radio Habana Social Club on January 21, 2022. \u003ccite>(Camilo Garzón)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>[dropcap]D[/dropcap]ancing and music are a connective tissue in their partnership that goes back to the beginning. As undergraduates at MIT, they got to know each other while dancing salsa together at a Cuban place in Boston, Massachusetts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The duo co-founded the DJ crew \u003ca href=\"http://lapelanga.com/about/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">La Pelanga Collective\u003c/a> (side note, go eat some \u003ca href=\"https://www.radionacional.co/cultura/la-pelanga-sazon-popular-en-las-calles-de-bogota\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">pelanga\u003c/a> and understand the sabor behind the name if you haven’t encountered it yet). When they DJ, it is both a dialogue and a dialectic. One starts, the other responds and tries to up the ante. They read the room and assess how to keep “breaking people’s expectations and the illusion of where songs are from,” Khoe told me. Ardila concurs: “People are entertained, they can dance, but they learn something too if they want to.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They express how DJing is organic, how it is always an opportunity to celebrate how cultures influence each other, taking down every wall, crossing every border. They see their DJ work as an extension of their advocacy, and have co-organized events with \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/13836809/peoples-kitchen-collective-serves-up-a-recipe-for-resilience\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">People’s Kitchen Collective\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/12291457/instead-of-dividing-a-border-wall-of-pinatas-brings-a-community-together\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">The Wall Project\u003c/a>, among others.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To bring it full circle, Khoe recently gave a talk at her and Ardila’s alma mater MIT as part of a series titled “\u003ca href=\"https://capd.mit.edu/events/2022/01/18/infinite-careers-may-li-khoe/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Infinite Careers\u003c/a>.” There she described the different things she does for work and throughout her career as changes in a switchboard or channel mixer. “You’re dealing with audio inputs and outputs,” she explained, “and you can add channels, you can mix them, you can turn one down and make another more prominent.” That is what she does with music, design, researching, dancing, writing and singing. And it’s also what Ardila does too, especially when they are DJing and teaching together.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The couple co-taught a class together at SFSU a few years ago, about merging design and math together to study possibilities. They approached the class from a constructivist standpoint that values personal perspectives, understanding that their students already come with a lot to the table. [aside postid='arts_13908905']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They also are both part of the bands \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/vallenatogozaimasu/?utm_medium=copy_link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Vallenato Gozaimasu\u003c/a> (a bilingual pun that combines a Colombian music genre with “arigato gozaimasu,” the polite Japanese expression for “thank you,” the ending of which also sounds like “goza y más,” or “enjoy and more” in Spanish) and \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/neblinasdelpacifico/?utm_medium=copy_link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Neblinas del Pacífico\u003c/a>. I was recently able to go check out the latter at a performance in the Mission’s Radio Habana Social Club. I was witness to the kind of alchemy that Khoe and Ardila know how to create. Respecting the music and instruments of the Afro-Colombian maestros—like the marimba de chonta that they got from maestro marimbero Hugo Candelario—and making sure that people enjoying the music know that Neblinas is borrowing and honoring this music.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They sent half of what they got in donations back to community initiatives in the Colombian Pacific Coast, especially to Puerto Buenaventura, to ground their performance in solidarity.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Khoe and Ardila are conveners. They create spaces to learn and to express. And they keep sharing with the rest of us, and each other, the out-of-the-box creative thinking that has connected them since the beginning of their partnership.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And to study possibilities, to design our lives to be more meaningful, I will keep looking to Ardila and Khoe as they continue their cultural and fractal impact in the Bay Area and beyond.\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Federico Ardila and May-Li Khoe's relationship is built on constant artistic play and exploration.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1705007195,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":22,"wordCount":1265},"headData":{"title":"How a Mathematician and a Designer Ignite Each Other’s Creative Spark | KQED","description":"Federico Ardila and May-Li Khoe's relationship is built on constant artistic play and exploration.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":"","schema":{"@context":"http://schema.org","@type":"Article","headline":"How a Mathematician and a Designer Ignite Each Other’s Creative Spark","datePublished":"2022-02-14T22:50:35.000Z","dateModified":"2024-01-11T21:06:35.000Z","image":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/KQED-OG-Image@1x.png"}},"sticky":false,"nprByline":"Camilo Garzón","templateType":"standard","featuredImageType":"standard","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","showOnAuthorArchivePages":"No","path":"/arts/13909414/federico-ardila-may-li-khoe","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class=\"utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__dropcapShortcode__dropcap\">W\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>hen thinking about the partnership between \u003ca href=\"http://math.sfsu.edu/federico/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Federico Ardila\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"http://www.maylikhoe.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">May-Li Khoe\u003c/a>, you could imagine how design and mathematics intersect and strengthen one another, much like these two creatives do in their careers and lives. That’s what we talked about at first when they invited me over to their home in San Francisco’s Mission District, where we enjoyed afternoon arepas and some cafecito.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For the couple, mathematics, design, art and music are just languages they have a fluency in—pathways to explore, improvise, and have fun.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At San Francisco State University, Ardila researches and teaches mathematics, with a focus in combinatorial theory and geometry. He is a leading advocate for the creation of \u003ca href=\"https://www.ams.org/publications/journals/notices/201610/rnoti-p1164.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">principles and practices that make math more human\u003c/a>, for understanding our biases and making space for people of color and non-binary folks to think of ourselves as mathematicians. He and Khoe are both DJs and musicians. And Khoe is also a designer, start-up founder and dancer currently pursuing her MFA in creative writing, also at San Francisco State.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Most of what I do in math, [May-Li] does in design,” Ardila says. But when they do work and collaborate together, “we do it in learning and mutual construction.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Khoe ended up pursuing undergraduate and master’s degrees in computer science and engineering at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (she was one class short of a math major). And Ardila went all the way from an undergraduate degree to a PhD in mathematics.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Traditional mathematics sometimes feels too rigid for Ardila. He says that he’s gotten more interested in forms that communicate that value of flexibility, such as what Khoe does with interaction design, which feels more like jazz music: it’s about improvisation and the experience. But Khoe thinks that math is improvisational, artistic and creative, too. Ardila agrees: math needs you to give up control, he says, to see “what can happen, what can work.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Khoe is Chinese-Indonesian and was born in the Netherlands. She’s also a twice immigrant, first to Canada and then to the United States. Ardila is a first generation immigrant to the U.S. from Colombia. (And a Bogotano, like me.) \u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"arts_13909254","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Khoe has an impressive design resume. At Apple, where she spent seven years, she worked on some of the first mobile apps, and helped develop newer features such as Touch Force and Taptic Engine. At the nonprofit Khan Academy, where she was until 2019, she worked her way up to vice president of design. She also co-founded two collaboration software companies, \u003ca href=\"https://scribbletogether.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Scribble\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://sprout.place/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Sprout\u003c/a>. She has also taught design classes and given talks at Carnegie Mellon University and Harvard University, to name a few.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>During the pandemic, Khoe began her masters program in creative writing after she and Ardila went on sabbatical to Colombia. There, she started writing a \u003ca href=\"https://tinyletter.com/mayli/letters/loss-hope-and-the-spaces-between\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">small travel newsletter\u003c/a> that she shared with friends and family. People told her they loved the way she saw things, and that’s when she decided to go for it and enroll in SFSU. Although she started with a focus on nonfiction, she’s interested in many forms, in genre-breaking narratives, and integrating the personal and the global to “write in a way that resonates with people’s hearts and also surprises or expands their minds.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I have found opportunities to see things in different ways, from the peripheries and the edges of things, which I enjoy doing,” she says of her work across different disciplines.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Those lessons also happen in her marriage with Ardila: how they relate, how they show care in conversations, how they see each other as intellectual equals—and artistic ones, too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13909424\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13909424\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"Federico Ardila and May-Li Khoe play percussion instruments in a restaurant parklet in San Francisco.\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-800x533.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-1020x679.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3-1536x1023.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/02/3.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Neblinas del Pacífico perform at Radio Habana Social Club on January 21, 2022. \u003ccite>(Camilo Garzón)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class=\"utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__dropcapShortcode__dropcap\">D\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>ancing and music are a connective tissue in their partnership that goes back to the beginning. As undergraduates at MIT, they got to know each other while dancing salsa together at a Cuban place in Boston, Massachusetts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The duo co-founded the DJ crew \u003ca href=\"http://lapelanga.com/about/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">La Pelanga Collective\u003c/a> (side note, go eat some \u003ca href=\"https://www.radionacional.co/cultura/la-pelanga-sazon-popular-en-las-calles-de-bogota\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">pelanga\u003c/a> and understand the sabor behind the name if you haven’t encountered it yet). When they DJ, it is both a dialogue and a dialectic. One starts, the other responds and tries to up the ante. They read the room and assess how to keep “breaking people’s expectations and the illusion of where songs are from,” Khoe told me. Ardila concurs: “People are entertained, they can dance, but they learn something too if they want to.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They express how DJing is organic, how it is always an opportunity to celebrate how cultures influence each other, taking down every wall, crossing every border. They see their DJ work as an extension of their advocacy, and have co-organized events with \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/13836809/peoples-kitchen-collective-serves-up-a-recipe-for-resilience\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">People’s Kitchen Collective\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/12291457/instead-of-dividing-a-border-wall-of-pinatas-brings-a-community-together\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">The Wall Project\u003c/a>, among others.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To bring it full circle, Khoe recently gave a talk at her and Ardila’s alma mater MIT as part of a series titled “\u003ca href=\"https://capd.mit.edu/events/2022/01/18/infinite-careers-may-li-khoe/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Infinite Careers\u003c/a>.” There she described the different things she does for work and throughout her career as changes in a switchboard or channel mixer. “You’re dealing with audio inputs and outputs,” she explained, “and you can add channels, you can mix them, you can turn one down and make another more prominent.” That is what she does with music, design, researching, dancing, writing and singing. And it’s also what Ardila does too, especially when they are DJing and teaching together.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The couple co-taught a class together at SFSU a few years ago, about merging design and math together to study possibilities. They approached the class from a constructivist standpoint that values personal perspectives, understanding that their students already come with a lot to the table. \u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"arts_13908905","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They also are both part of the bands \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/vallenatogozaimasu/?utm_medium=copy_link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Vallenato Gozaimasu\u003c/a> (a bilingual pun that combines a Colombian music genre with “arigato gozaimasu,” the polite Japanese expression for “thank you,” the ending of which also sounds like “goza y más,” or “enjoy and more” in Spanish) and \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/neblinasdelpacifico/?utm_medium=copy_link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Neblinas del Pacífico\u003c/a>. I was recently able to go check out the latter at a performance in the Mission’s Radio Habana Social Club. I was witness to the kind of alchemy that Khoe and Ardila know how to create. Respecting the music and instruments of the Afro-Colombian maestros—like the marimba de chonta that they got from maestro marimbero Hugo Candelario—and making sure that people enjoying the music know that Neblinas is borrowing and honoring this music.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They sent half of what they got in donations back to community initiatives in the Colombian Pacific Coast, especially to Puerto Buenaventura, to ground their performance in solidarity.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Khoe and Ardila are conveners. They create spaces to learn and to express. And they keep sharing with the rest of us, and each other, the out-of-the-box creative thinking that has connected them since the beginning of their partnership.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And to study possibilities, to design our lives to be more meaningful, I will keep looking to Ardila and Khoe as they continue their cultural and fractal impact in the Bay Area and beyond.\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/arts/13909414/federico-ardila-may-li-khoe","authors":["byline_arts_13909414"],"categories":["arts_1"],"tags":["arts_10278","arts_9510","arts_3923"],"featImg":"arts_13909422","label":"arts"},"arts_13909135":{"type":"posts","id":"arts_13909135","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"arts","id":"13909135","score":null,"sort":[1644444673000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"colman-domingo-strand-theater-valentines-euphoria-walking-dead-zola","title":"Colman Domingo Wants to Spend Valentine’s Day With You","publishDate":1644444673,"format":"standard","headTitle":"Colman Domingo Wants to Spend Valentine’s Day With You | KQED","labelTerm":{"term":140,"site":"arts"},"content":"\u003cp>Colman Domingo met the love of his life in the Bay Area. Back in 2005, while starring in \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4626728\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">a Berkeley Rep production of \u003cem>The People’s Temple\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, he and his husband Raúl first locked eyes inside a Berkeley Walgreens. Domingo was on the phone with someone, and Raúl got dragged away by a friend before the two could strike up a conversation. This being the aughts, however, the couple later located one another (and arranged to have their first date in San Francisco) via Craigslist’s Missed Connections. Meet cutes don’t get more Bay Area than that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Needless to say, Colman Domingo doesn’t at all mind spending this Valentine’s Day back in the city. And this time, he wants you to join him. The much-lauded actor—as famous for his TV roles in \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuC45mIq4kY\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZenq94Gkyc\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Fear the Walking Dead\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, as he is for his movie parts in the likes of \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=24KbaKlCDDI\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Zola\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x6t7vVTxaic\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Selma\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2UJc5yef4fc\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom\u003c/em>\u003c/a>—will be spending Feb. 14 on stage at the Strand Theater. And though Domingo’s theater pedigree is impressive, for once he won’t be there to act. Instead, the former Mission District resident will be in conversation with his best friend, Sean San José—artistic director of the \u003ca href=\"http://magictheatre.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Magic Theatre\u003c/a>. Domingo is also on Magic’s board of directors, and conceived this event to raise money and publicity for the organization.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>KQED Arts & Culture caught up with Domingo on the phone a week before the big event.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What was the idea behind this Valentine’s Day event?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I believe board members should be responsible to the theater in very specific ways that call on their superpowers. So I thought “What is the thing that I can do to raise funds, to create some buzz, to introduce people to Sean and to his leadership?” I said “Why don’t we do a conversation?” If it brings fans from the \u003cem>Fear the Walking Dead\u003c/em> universe or from \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> to the Magic Theater, so be it. It’ll be wonderful. For me, it’s about moving along others’ work. Valentine’s Day just seemed like the time to do it. It’s about love. Love of the theater, love for community and bringing us together. It’s my love for San Francisco.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>You lived in San Francisco when you were starting out, didn’t you? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I lived there between 1991 and 2001. I moved there [from Philadelphia] to become an actor. I really owe a lot to my Bay Area years because I was in my 20s—that’s when you become who you’re going to become. My closest friends and comrades who I still create with are there. Like Sean, who I met at \u003ca href=\"https://www.berkeleyrep.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Berkeley Rep\u003c/a> while we were doing youth theater. We did a touring production of \u003cem>The Yellow Boat\u003c/em> and he became my best friend. To this day, we’re on the phone at least a couple of times a week. I have deep roots in the Bay Area. San Francisco is truly one of my artistic homes. It’s never left me.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Is there a stage role from your time living here that you look back as a turning point in your career?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One was \u003ca href=\"https://www.paloaltoonline.com/weekly/morgue/listings/1997_Sep_12.3RDART12.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Blues For an Alabama Sky\u003c/em>\u003c/a> [at TheatreWorks in 1997]. I got so much attention for that and people started to understand what I did. That was a turning point. And I came back to Berkeley Rep to do \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/11742/passing_strange\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Passing Strange\u003c/em> in 2006\u003c/a>, and it was the little show that changed my life. It offered me my Broadway debut. I had lost my mother a month before we started rehearsals and it was like a calling that I had to be back in the Bay Area. It’s where I did a lot of my healing … and it changed my entire career.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>I’d like to talk about your role in \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em>. You play Ali, the sponsor of 17-year-old Rue (played by Zendaya) who’s struggling with drug addiction. Whenever you two are together, it’s like a battle between the disillusionment of youth and the wisdom that comes with age and experience. \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That’s a great way to put it. That’s exactly it. I think there’s something about Ali that [\u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> creator] Sam [Levinson] is very intentional about. Ali is an anchor. Because the narrator for the show, Rue, cannot be depended on. You can’t depend on her because she is struggling.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>I think the special episode you and Zendaya did between Seasons 1 and 2—just the two of you talking in a diner—was probably the most powerful piece of television from 2020. \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When we were about to start Season 2 of \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em>, we had a table read, it was wonderful, then the pandemic happened and we were shut down. In the second season, there were fragments of that conversation with Zendaya spread throughout the season. And so Sam had the brilliant idea of actually making that a more intimate experience and not spreading it out. I think honestly, the reason that episode is so powerful is because it was the end of the first year of this pandemic. This script felt like a prayer, it felt like a meditation on the year.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skQMztq7oRI&t=50s\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>How did the two of you prepare for such raw scenes? How do you make it so real?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I put my entire soul into that because it was touching on everything that I care about. Revolutions, and inhumanity, and people being able to come back into society, and the disease of addiction which takes so many forms. So I put myself through at least 120 hours of rehearsal. I come from theater, so a 40-hour rehearsal week is not anything for me. I decided that the work needed that attention. I rehearsed it in a way to be available. I wanted to understand not only the characters, but the moments and the things that they’re wrestling with. I didn’t want that to look like work. I didn’t want you to see the work. I wanted it to just be breath, and living, and experiencing. And I think Zendaya put herself through the same process. I look at that [episode] and I recognize it as some of my best work.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Do you find that \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> is what people most recognize you for now?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Right now, it’s \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em>—it seems like \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> has taken on a mind of its own. But my fan base is all walks of life. Usually these days, I can tell who my fan base is just by looking at them. I like to guess where they know me from. Usually, you can tell who the \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> base is because they all look like they’re in \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em>! Black people know me from every historical Black film I’ve done. But I also have a queer fanbase that knows me from when I did sketch comedy on \u003cem>The Big Gay Sketch Show\u003c/em> with Kate McKinnon. I also have a rabid, voracious, \u003cem>Walking Dead\u003c/em> universe fan base.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbwEfU4Cn80\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Do the \u003cem>Fear the Walking Dead\u003c/em> fans hate you since your character, Strand, went full villain in Season 7?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh yeah, they completely hate me (laughs). But I love it because a good show should be polarizing. People are complicated. I enjoy that he’s not just … to the middle.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>In the first season of \u003cem>Fear the Walking Dead\u003c/em>, Strand was trying to help a teen addict survive the apocalypse. I can’t help but see parallels of that role in what Ali is doing in \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> now with Rue.\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s funny. I was such a nerdy kid. I wasn’t a troubled teen. In my family I was the youngest of three. I watched my older siblings run the streets and be a little wilder and I think my responsibility in the family was to be a good boy and not be a problem. But I could see the problem because I’m an ardent watcher of people. I think my superpower is being an empath and understanding people, and understanding things without judgment. And maybe that’s why I’m called on to play these roles because there’s something about my own story as Colman that I can bring to these characters.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Since you’re going to be in the Bay for Valentine’s, will you be visiting that Berkeley Walgreens where you met your husband?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I am bringing my husband with me! The funny thing is, it’s now not a Walgreens. It’s now a Target. But we’re making this a five-day event. We’re taking a long drive, we’ll stop at Big Sur, then on up to the Bay, get in a little early, hang out with a couple of friends, and stop by \u003ca href=\"https://www.nctcsf.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">New Conservatory Theater\u003c/a>, which is where I got my start. That’s the first place I ever did any show. They’re actually doing my play \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.concordtheatricals.com/p/60374/dot\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Dot\u003c/a>.\u003c/em> So we’ll check in, look at the set, probably meet the cast. I used to live on 22nd and Valencia right above Valencia Cyclery. So I’m sure I’ll stop by and look up at the window. I’m a softie in that way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>And what food will you be running towards the fastest?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh my god! \u003ca href=\"https://slanteddoorgroup.com/sanfrancisco\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">The Slanted Door\u003c/a>. It’s one of my favorite places. And I want to go to \u003ca href=\"https://tartinebakery.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Tartine\u003c/a>! Also, \u003ca href=\"https://sfpanchovilla.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Pancho Villa\u003c/a>. They always had the best burritos. I have found that there is nowhere else in the world that makes a good burrito besides the Bay Area.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-12127869\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-800x78.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"78\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-768x75.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Colman Domingo will be in conversation with Sean San José at the \u003ca href=\"https://www.act-sf.org/your-visit/our-venues/the-strand-theater/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Strand Theater\u003c/a> on Monday, Feb. 14 at 8pm. \u003ca href=\"https://app.mobilecause.com/e/rFJgow?vid=ptn4m\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Details here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"The star of ‘Euphoria’ and ‘Zola’ talks about his love for the Bay and his upcoming Strand Theater appearance.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1705007215,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":true,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":29,"wordCount":1734},"headData":{"title":"Q&A: Colman Domingo on Euphoria, Walking Dead and Theater | KQED","description":"The star of ‘Euphoria’ and ‘Zola’ talks about his love for the Bay and his upcoming Strand Theater appearance.","ogTitle":"Colman Domingo Wants to Spend Valentine's Day With You","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"Colman Domingo Wants to Spend Valentine's Day With You","twDescription":"","twImgId":"","socialTitle":"Q&A: Colman Domingo on Euphoria, Walking Dead and Theater%%page%% %%sep%% KQED","schema":{"@context":"http://schema.org","@type":"Article","headline":"Colman Domingo Wants to Spend Valentine’s Day With You","datePublished":"2022-02-09T22:11:13.000Z","dateModified":"2024-01-11T21:06:55.000Z","image":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/KQED-OG-Image@1x.png"}},"sticky":false,"templateType":"standard","featuredImageType":"standard","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","path":"/arts/13909135/colman-domingo-strand-theater-valentines-euphoria-walking-dead-zola","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Colman Domingo met the love of his life in the Bay Area. Back in 2005, while starring in \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4626728\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">a Berkeley Rep production of \u003cem>The People’s Temple\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, he and his husband Raúl first locked eyes inside a Berkeley Walgreens. Domingo was on the phone with someone, and Raúl got dragged away by a friend before the two could strike up a conversation. This being the aughts, however, the couple later located one another (and arranged to have their first date in San Francisco) via Craigslist’s Missed Connections. Meet cutes don’t get more Bay Area than that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Needless to say, Colman Domingo doesn’t at all mind spending this Valentine’s Day back in the city. And this time, he wants you to join him. The much-lauded actor—as famous for his TV roles in \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuC45mIq4kY\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZenq94Gkyc\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Fear the Walking Dead\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, as he is for his movie parts in the likes of \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=24KbaKlCDDI\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Zola\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x6t7vVTxaic\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Selma\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2UJc5yef4fc\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom\u003c/em>\u003c/a>—will be spending Feb. 14 on stage at the Strand Theater. And though Domingo’s theater pedigree is impressive, for once he won’t be there to act. Instead, the former Mission District resident will be in conversation with his best friend, Sean San José—artistic director of the \u003ca href=\"http://magictheatre.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Magic Theatre\u003c/a>. Domingo is also on Magic’s board of directors, and conceived this event to raise money and publicity for the organization.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>KQED Arts & Culture caught up with Domingo on the phone a week before the big event.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What was the idea behind this Valentine’s Day event?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I believe board members should be responsible to the theater in very specific ways that call on their superpowers. So I thought “What is the thing that I can do to raise funds, to create some buzz, to introduce people to Sean and to his leadership?” I said “Why don’t we do a conversation?” If it brings fans from the \u003cem>Fear the Walking Dead\u003c/em> universe or from \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> to the Magic Theater, so be it. It’ll be wonderful. For me, it’s about moving along others’ work. Valentine’s Day just seemed like the time to do it. It’s about love. Love of the theater, love for community and bringing us together. It’s my love for San Francisco.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>You lived in San Francisco when you were starting out, didn’t you? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I lived there between 1991 and 2001. I moved there [from Philadelphia] to become an actor. I really owe a lot to my Bay Area years because I was in my 20s—that’s when you become who you’re going to become. My closest friends and comrades who I still create with are there. Like Sean, who I met at \u003ca href=\"https://www.berkeleyrep.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Berkeley Rep\u003c/a> while we were doing youth theater. We did a touring production of \u003cem>The Yellow Boat\u003c/em> and he became my best friend. To this day, we’re on the phone at least a couple of times a week. I have deep roots in the Bay Area. San Francisco is truly one of my artistic homes. It’s never left me.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Is there a stage role from your time living here that you look back as a turning point in your career?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One was \u003ca href=\"https://www.paloaltoonline.com/weekly/morgue/listings/1997_Sep_12.3RDART12.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Blues For an Alabama Sky\u003c/em>\u003c/a> [at TheatreWorks in 1997]. I got so much attention for that and people started to understand what I did. That was a turning point. And I came back to Berkeley Rep to do \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/11742/passing_strange\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Passing Strange\u003c/em> in 2006\u003c/a>, and it was the little show that changed my life. It offered me my Broadway debut. I had lost my mother a month before we started rehearsals and it was like a calling that I had to be back in the Bay Area. It’s where I did a lot of my healing … and it changed my entire career.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>I’d like to talk about your role in \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em>. You play Ali, the sponsor of 17-year-old Rue (played by Zendaya) who’s struggling with drug addiction. Whenever you two are together, it’s like a battle between the disillusionment of youth and the wisdom that comes with age and experience. \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That’s a great way to put it. That’s exactly it. I think there’s something about Ali that [\u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> creator] Sam [Levinson] is very intentional about. Ali is an anchor. Because the narrator for the show, Rue, cannot be depended on. You can’t depend on her because she is struggling.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>I think the special episode you and Zendaya did between Seasons 1 and 2—just the two of you talking in a diner—was probably the most powerful piece of television from 2020. \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When we were about to start Season 2 of \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em>, we had a table read, it was wonderful, then the pandemic happened and we were shut down. In the second season, there were fragments of that conversation with Zendaya spread throughout the season. And so Sam had the brilliant idea of actually making that a more intimate experience and not spreading it out. I think honestly, the reason that episode is so powerful is because it was the end of the first year of this pandemic. This script felt like a prayer, it felt like a meditation on the year.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/skQMztq7oRI'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/skQMztq7oRI'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cstrong>How did the two of you prepare for such raw scenes? How do you make it so real?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I put my entire soul into that because it was touching on everything that I care about. Revolutions, and inhumanity, and people being able to come back into society, and the disease of addiction which takes so many forms. So I put myself through at least 120 hours of rehearsal. I come from theater, so a 40-hour rehearsal week is not anything for me. I decided that the work needed that attention. I rehearsed it in a way to be available. I wanted to understand not only the characters, but the moments and the things that they’re wrestling with. I didn’t want that to look like work. I didn’t want you to see the work. I wanted it to just be breath, and living, and experiencing. And I think Zendaya put herself through the same process. I look at that [episode] and I recognize it as some of my best work.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Do you find that \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> is what people most recognize you for now?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Right now, it’s \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em>—it seems like \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> has taken on a mind of its own. But my fan base is all walks of life. Usually these days, I can tell who my fan base is just by looking at them. I like to guess where they know me from. Usually, you can tell who the \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> base is because they all look like they’re in \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em>! Black people know me from every historical Black film I’ve done. But I also have a queer fanbase that knows me from when I did sketch comedy on \u003cem>The Big Gay Sketch Show\u003c/em> with Kate McKinnon. I also have a rabid, voracious, \u003cem>Walking Dead\u003c/em> universe fan base.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/LbwEfU4Cn80'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/LbwEfU4Cn80'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Do the \u003cem>Fear the Walking Dead\u003c/em> fans hate you since your character, Strand, went full villain in Season 7?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh yeah, they completely hate me (laughs). But I love it because a good show should be polarizing. People are complicated. I enjoy that he’s not just … to the middle.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>In the first season of \u003cem>Fear the Walking Dead\u003c/em>, Strand was trying to help a teen addict survive the apocalypse. I can’t help but see parallels of that role in what Ali is doing in \u003cem>Euphoria\u003c/em> now with Rue.\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s funny. I was such a nerdy kid. I wasn’t a troubled teen. In my family I was the youngest of three. I watched my older siblings run the streets and be a little wilder and I think my responsibility in the family was to be a good boy and not be a problem. But I could see the problem because I’m an ardent watcher of people. I think my superpower is being an empath and understanding people, and understanding things without judgment. And maybe that’s why I’m called on to play these roles because there’s something about my own story as Colman that I can bring to these characters.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Since you’re going to be in the Bay for Valentine’s, will you be visiting that Berkeley Walgreens where you met your husband?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I am bringing my husband with me! The funny thing is, it’s now not a Walgreens. It’s now a Target. But we’re making this a five-day event. We’re taking a long drive, we’ll stop at Big Sur, then on up to the Bay, get in a little early, hang out with a couple of friends, and stop by \u003ca href=\"https://www.nctcsf.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">New Conservatory Theater\u003c/a>, which is where I got my start. That’s the first place I ever did any show. They’re actually doing my play \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.concordtheatricals.com/p/60374/dot\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Dot\u003c/a>.\u003c/em> So we’ll check in, look at the set, probably meet the cast. I used to live on 22nd and Valencia right above Valencia Cyclery. So I’m sure I’ll stop by and look up at the window. I’m a softie in that way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>And what food will you be running towards the fastest?\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh my god! \u003ca href=\"https://slanteddoorgroup.com/sanfrancisco\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">The Slanted Door\u003c/a>. It’s one of my favorite places. And I want to go to \u003ca href=\"https://tartinebakery.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Tartine\u003c/a>! Also, \u003ca href=\"https://sfpanchovilla.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Pancho Villa\u003c/a>. They always had the best burritos. I have found that there is nowhere else in the world that makes a good burrito besides the Bay Area.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-12127869\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-800x78.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"78\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-768x75.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Colman Domingo will be in conversation with Sean San José at the \u003ca href=\"https://www.act-sf.org/your-visit/our-venues/the-strand-theater/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Strand Theater\u003c/a> on Monday, Feb. 14 at 8pm. \u003ca href=\"https://app.mobilecause.com/e/rFJgow?vid=ptn4m\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Details here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/arts/13909135/colman-domingo-strand-theater-valentines-euphoria-walking-dead-zola","authors":["11242"],"programs":["arts_140"],"categories":["arts_1","arts_74","arts_967","arts_990"],"tags":["arts_10342","arts_12226","arts_10278","arts_13012","arts_3923"],"featImg":"arts_13909149","label":"arts_140"},"arts_13892534":{"type":"posts","id":"arts_13892534","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"arts","id":"13892534","score":null,"sort":[1613158897000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"finding-acceptance-and-self-love-in-a-naturalist-community","title":"Finding Acceptance—and Self-Love—in a Naturist Community","publishDate":1613158897,"format":"standard","headTitle":"Finding Acceptance—and Self-Love—in a Naturist Community | KQED","labelTerm":{},"content":"\u003cp>\u003ci>It’s Tuesday morning and my phone is ringing. Before even looking at the screen, I know it’s my sister, Erikka. Every week for the past six months or so, my sister has spent 10 minutes telling me about her weekend escapades. The accounts are adventurous, liberating, and oddly enough, about love.\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>My sister, a mother of two, has been through some harrowing experiences. Just about all of the foul things a young woman can be involved in while growing up in the inner city—from selling sex to selling crack—she’s done it. And she’s open about how those experiences have left marks on her, physically, mentally, and emotionally.\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>Now recently married, my sister’s phone calls aren’t about the pain she’s experienced, and really aren’t about the romantic relationship she and her partner share. They’re more about her discovery of a loving community. And most importantly, her stories are about an East Oakland girl finding self-love near the Santa Cruz Mountains.\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>Because it’s her story, I figured she’d be the best person to tell it.\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>—Pendarvis Harshaw\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13892748\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13892748\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-800x555.jpg\" alt=\"Erikka Ransom and husband Dom at Lake Merritt in Oakland.\" width=\"800\" height=\"555\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-800x555.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-1020x708.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-160x111.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-768x533.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-1536x1066.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_.jpg 1556w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Erikka Ransom and husband Dom at Lake Merritt in Oakland. \u003ccite>(Pendarvis Harshaw)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Love… We tend to throw the word around like confetti, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">but it means more and comes with so much responsibility. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">I found my love when I was only 15. He was my neighbor, my friend, and the love of my life, even though he didn’t know it yet. We grew up together and separated when both our families moved from the Skyline Hills Apartment complex in the East Oakland hills. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">We individually went through a great deal of hurt during our lives. Hard times financially, run-ins with the law, and relationships that scarred us for life.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In adulthood, we talked periodically, remaining good friends. We’d often discuss our relationships, and how they were missing \u003cem>something\u003c/em>. We were both suffering, both missing love.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">My last relationship ended after 11 years—there was no love there for me. His 20-year relationship ended just before mine.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">About four years ago I saw the love of my life again. I was driving down the street near Foothill Square in East Oakland. I had just moved into an apartment in the neighborhood. About a block away from my new home, I saw him outside taking a break from work. I almost left the car in drive as I jumped out! Happiness rushed back into my heart as I remembered love again. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Despite the pandemic, we married on July 27, 2020. We wanted to be together forever, so much that we held a small ceremony in our backyard, over an iPad, with the Justice of Peace. It was beautiful. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13892739\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13892739\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.jpg\" alt=\"Erikka Ransom and husband Dom, pictured together.\" width=\"800\" height=\"804\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka-160x161.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka-768x772.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Erikka Ransom and husband Dom, pictured together. \u003ccite>(Courtesy Erikka Ransom)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">We’re both lovers of camping; time spent in nature actually helped solidify our relationship. We decided to find a place to enjoy the outdoors during the shelter-in-place orders. But most campsites were closed.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">And then we found a place that was unlike any other: \u003ca href=\"https://www.lupinlodge.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Lupin Lodge\u003c/a>. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This is a community that welcomes newcomers with open arms. We started going in August and we’ve been back every weekend, just because of the love we feel. The first day we were there, people invited us to eat with them, and asked if we needed anything. They even recited poems just to help us relax in a new environment. It was amazing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I have to mention that Lupin is a “naturist community,” where people are free to be nude, so it was a little different than the camping experiences we’ve had in the past. During previous camping trips to places like Lake Camanche, I’d jump in the lake naked when no one was around. So once I found a place where I could walk around naked without having the police called on me, I was down!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>There’s nothing sexual about it. It’s about being free. You feel the nature, and the love from everyone around you. And best of all: there’s no judgement. You could be fat, skinny or whatever, and people are just accepting. I’ve been self-conscious of my stretch marks for a long time, and I didn’t feel that when I was out there. I don’t know if I’ve ever been to a place where I felt no judgement, even when I’m fully clothed.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13892752\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\" style=\"max-width: 320px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13892752\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Lupin.jpg\" alt=\"Lupin Lodge. \" width=\"320\" height=\"400\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Lupin.jpg 320w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Lupin-160x200.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 320px) 100vw, 320px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Lupin Lodge. \u003ccite>(Yelp)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>My husband, Dom, is a man’s man: a barber and Mustang driver. He was able to stand naked, and give handshakes and hugs to other naked men without feeling any type of way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The experience was never weird or uncomfortable, like the movies about stereotypical “nudist colonies.” It was like meeting a family you didn’t know for the first time. And taking no time in really getting to \u003cem>know \u003c/em>them. People do yoga and play sports, sing songs and break bread. Most of all, people simply spread love.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We’ve recently purchased an RV trailer and more camping equipment, and now we make the trek from the East Bay to the Santa Cruz area weekly. Each time it’s refreshing to get away, if only for just a little while. The new family we have now has given us something to look forward to on the weekends; a blessing during these times.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s also made me question: where does love come from? In my life, I’ve learned that it’s possible to feel love from others, just as it’s possible to feel hate. They’re both strong feelings that people can sense, almost like pheromones.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And there’s also people who are able to send “fake love,” feelings that damage peoples’ ability to sense and accept real love. I experienced a lot of fake love in my life, and it’s refreshing to find the real thing. It takes time to find out what’s really real. Trips to nature, and being in your natural state can help.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In my opinion, the easiest way to decipher the real from the fake is that when you question love, maybe you should let it go. And when you feel love with your whole heart—be it the love of a person or a place—embrace it and give love back in return.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Love to all.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cem>—Erikka Ransom\u003c/em>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-800x78.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"78\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-12127869\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-768x75.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Correction: The original version of this story inaccurately referred to Lupin Lodge as a “naturalist community,” rather than a “naturist community.” The story has been edited to correct the term.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"After a life in the inner city, Erikka Ransom found a welcoming community in the Santa Cruz mountains.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1705019477,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":29,"wordCount":1166},"headData":{"title":"Finding Acceptance—and Self-Love—in a Naturist Community | KQED","description":"After a life in the inner city, Erikka Ransom found a welcoming community in the Santa Cruz mountains.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":"","schema":{"@context":"http://schema.org","@type":"Article","headline":"Finding Acceptance—and Self-Love—in a Naturist Community","datePublished":"2021-02-12T19:41:37.000Z","dateModified":"2024-01-12T00:31:17.000Z","image":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/KQED-OG-Image@1x.png"}},"source":"Commentary","sticky":false,"nprByline":"Pendarvis Harshaw and Erikka Ransom","templateType":"standard","featuredImageType":"standard","path":"/arts/13892534/finding-acceptance-and-self-love-in-a-naturalist-community","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003ci>It’s Tuesday morning and my phone is ringing. Before even looking at the screen, I know it’s my sister, Erikka. Every week for the past six months or so, my sister has spent 10 minutes telling me about her weekend escapades. The accounts are adventurous, liberating, and oddly enough, about love.\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>My sister, a mother of two, has been through some harrowing experiences. Just about all of the foul things a young woman can be involved in while growing up in the inner city—from selling sex to selling crack—she’s done it. And she’s open about how those experiences have left marks on her, physically, mentally, and emotionally.\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>Now recently married, my sister’s phone calls aren’t about the pain she’s experienced, and really aren’t about the romantic relationship she and her partner share. They’re more about her discovery of a loving community. And most importantly, her stories are about an East Oakland girl finding self-love near the Santa Cruz Mountains.\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>Because it’s her story, I figured she’d be the best person to tell it.\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>—Pendarvis Harshaw\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13892748\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13892748\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-800x555.jpg\" alt=\"Erikka Ransom and husband Dom at Lake Merritt in Oakland.\" width=\"800\" height=\"555\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-800x555.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-1020x708.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-160x111.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-768x533.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_-1536x1066.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.Lake_.jpg 1556w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Erikka Ransom and husband Dom at Lake Merritt in Oakland. \u003ccite>(Pendarvis Harshaw)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Love… We tend to throw the word around like confetti, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">but it means more and comes with so much responsibility. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">I found my love when I was only 15. He was my neighbor, my friend, and the love of my life, even though he didn’t know it yet. We grew up together and separated when both our families moved from the Skyline Hills Apartment complex in the East Oakland hills. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">We individually went through a great deal of hurt during our lives. Hard times financially, run-ins with the law, and relationships that scarred us for life.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In adulthood, we talked periodically, remaining good friends. We’d often discuss our relationships, and how they were missing \u003cem>something\u003c/em>. We were both suffering, both missing love.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">My last relationship ended after 11 years—there was no love there for me. His 20-year relationship ended just before mine.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">About four years ago I saw the love of my life again. I was driving down the street near Foothill Square in East Oakland. I had just moved into an apartment in the neighborhood. About a block away from my new home, I saw him outside taking a break from work. I almost left the car in drive as I jumped out! Happiness rushed back into my heart as I remembered love again. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Despite the pandemic, we married on July 27, 2020. We wanted to be together forever, so much that we held a small ceremony in our backyard, over an iPad, with the Justice of Peace. It was beautiful. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13892739\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13892739\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.jpg\" alt=\"Erikka Ransom and husband Dom, pictured together.\" width=\"800\" height=\"804\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka-160x161.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Erikka-768x772.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Erikka Ransom and husband Dom, pictured together. \u003ccite>(Courtesy Erikka Ransom)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">We’re both lovers of camping; time spent in nature actually helped solidify our relationship. We decided to find a place to enjoy the outdoors during the shelter-in-place orders. But most campsites were closed.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">And then we found a place that was unlike any other: \u003ca href=\"https://www.lupinlodge.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Lupin Lodge\u003c/a>. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This is a community that welcomes newcomers with open arms. We started going in August and we’ve been back every weekend, just because of the love we feel. The first day we were there, people invited us to eat with them, and asked if we needed anything. They even recited poems just to help us relax in a new environment. It was amazing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I have to mention that Lupin is a “naturist community,” where people are free to be nude, so it was a little different than the camping experiences we’ve had in the past. During previous camping trips to places like Lake Camanche, I’d jump in the lake naked when no one was around. So once I found a place where I could walk around naked without having the police called on me, I was down!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>There’s nothing sexual about it. It’s about being free. You feel the nature, and the love from everyone around you. And best of all: there’s no judgement. You could be fat, skinny or whatever, and people are just accepting. I’ve been self-conscious of my stretch marks for a long time, and I didn’t feel that when I was out there. I don’t know if I’ve ever been to a place where I felt no judgement, even when I’m fully clothed.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13892752\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\" style=\"max-width: 320px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13892752\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Lupin.jpg\" alt=\"Lupin Lodge. \" width=\"320\" height=\"400\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Lupin.jpg 320w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/02/Lupin-160x200.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 320px) 100vw, 320px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Lupin Lodge. \u003ccite>(Yelp)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>My husband, Dom, is a man’s man: a barber and Mustang driver. He was able to stand naked, and give handshakes and hugs to other naked men without feeling any type of way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The experience was never weird or uncomfortable, like the movies about stereotypical “nudist colonies.” It was like meeting a family you didn’t know for the first time. And taking no time in really getting to \u003cem>know \u003c/em>them. People do yoga and play sports, sing songs and break bread. Most of all, people simply spread love.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We’ve recently purchased an RV trailer and more camping equipment, and now we make the trek from the East Bay to the Santa Cruz area weekly. Each time it’s refreshing to get away, if only for just a little while. The new family we have now has given us something to look forward to on the weekends; a blessing during these times.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s also made me question: where does love come from? In my life, I’ve learned that it’s possible to feel love from others, just as it’s possible to feel hate. They’re both strong feelings that people can sense, almost like pheromones.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And there’s also people who are able to send “fake love,” feelings that damage peoples’ ability to sense and accept real love. I experienced a lot of fake love in my life, and it’s refreshing to find the real thing. It takes time to find out what’s really real. Trips to nature, and being in your natural state can help.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In my opinion, the easiest way to decipher the real from the fake is that when you question love, maybe you should let it go. And when you feel love with your whole heart—be it the love of a person or a place—embrace it and give love back in return.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Love to all.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cem>—Erikka Ransom\u003c/em>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-800x78.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"78\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-12127869\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-768x75.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Correction: The original version of this story inaccurately referred to Lupin Lodge as a “naturalist community,” rather than a “naturist community.” The story has been edited to correct the term.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/arts/13892534/finding-acceptance-and-self-love-in-a-naturalist-community","authors":["byline_arts_13892534"],"categories":["arts_1","arts_2303"],"tags":["arts_2767","arts_5016","arts_10342","arts_3931","arts_1143","arts_6672","arts_3923"],"featImg":"arts_13892749","label":"source_arts_13892534"},"arts_13892743":{"type":"posts","id":"arts_13892743","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"arts","id":"13892743","score":null,"sort":[1613158599000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"its-not-me-its-you-choosing-singledom-in-the-pandemic","title":"It’s Not Me, It’s You: Choosing Singledom in the Pandemic","publishDate":1613158599,"format":"standard","headTitle":"It’s Not Me, It’s You: Choosing Singledom in the Pandemic | KQED","labelTerm":{},"content":"\u003cp>[dropcap]Y[/dropcap]ou’ve probably heard of FOMO, or Fear of Missing Out. But the singles among us are likelier to encounter something else while stuck inside and swiping on dating apps: FOBO—Fear of Better Options.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Coined by Patrick McGinnis, \u003ca href=\"https://patrickmcginnis.com/blog/meet-fobo-the-evil-brother-of-fomo-that-can-ruin-your-life/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">FOBO\u003c/a> is the free fall of overthinking every possible option and inevitably remaining in free fall. That’s one drawback of looking for love online during the pandemic. Apps are not just an entertaining way to pass the time—they’re one of the few means of meeting new people safely. But they’re also designed to provide a sense of instant gratification. And some people confuse Tinder with Grubhub, approaching people like a buffet of viable partner options.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The problem with this mindset is it’s impossible to fix the perfect plate. Or maybe you took what you could get to distract yourself, or dipped into the compost bin to reignite an old flame, only to find yourself unsatisfied.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>These scenarios operate on the anxiety that COVID-19 is looming overhead. Opportunities to find companionship feel scarce, and some might feel tempted to tolerate flakiness, incompatibility or even disrespect to feel less alone. But the fact is, it’s hard to have a fear of better options when you realize the better option is probably yourself. While \u003ca href=\"https://www.huffpost.com/entry/tweets-dating-covid_l_5f45444cc5b6c00d03b4b0a3\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">articles\u003c/a> about single life during the pandemic paint a purely pessimistic picture, this narrative is tired. I’d argue that the pandemic has only accelerated changes in courtship, dating and marriage that were already underway. [aside postid='arts_13892182,arts_13892333']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Maybe you got lucky and found the one, but if you haven’t, this past year has provided you with two options: either choose to meet the loneliness head on or jump into something lackluster to sidetrack yourself from discomfort. If you choose the latter, you might find yourself rushing into an entanglement for the simple sake of closeness. And I wouldn’t blame you. I tried dating out of fear of my solitude at first. I was giddy with the increased level of courtship involved—picnics in my front yard, trips to outdoor dining while masked up. Navigating COVID-19 safety caused me to abstain from sex for a year. I’m also just at a point in my life where I’m exhausted by games and don’t want just anyone in my intimate sphere. I had fun, especially in the summer. I even convinced myself that I’d roll with one situationship, but soon realized the lack of emotional depth was doing me more harm than my own company. I chose myself.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The thing is, once you’ve known tranquility, you’ll never take it for granted again. This past year cost many people their lives and livelihoods; it upended most of the social norms. And that stress doesn’t go away if you’re in a relationship. And if you don’t choose a partner wisely, that stress will only increase. For all the challenges this year has posed, I’ve also known peace of mind \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2021/02/05/963531042/malcolm-marie-is-lost-just-like-its-central-couple\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Malcolm and Marie\u003c/em>\u003c/a> could only dream of. Is working through loneliness such a bad thing? Some of us have actually been reaching astronomical levels of self-actualization.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And according to recent research, if you’re a woman who dates men, you’re might be\u003ca href=\"https://happiful.com/single-men-suffering-most-from-loneliness/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"> more resilient\u003c/a> against the stressors of the pandemic than the men you date. That’s because men are socialized to use romantic relationships as their \u003ca href=\"https://www.harpersbazaar.com/culture/features/a27259689/toxic-masculinity-male-friendships-emotional-labor-men-rely-on-women/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">only means of emotional support\u003c/a>, and are less \u003ca href=\"https://www.theguardian.com/society/2016/nov/05/men-less-likely-to-get-help--mental-health\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">likely to get professional help\u003c/a>. Tired of playing therapist, more women are choosing to stay single than ever before, a trend we might see COVID accelerating. Millennials are also \u003ca href=\"https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2018-09-25/millennials-are-causing-the-u-s-divorce-rate-to-plummet\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">waiting to get married\u003c/a>, which has meant that marriages are lasting longer than they did in the past. Perhaps being the children of a generation with a high divorce rate has taught us a thing or two about getting our lives and finances in order before getting serious or tying the knot.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[dropcap]L[/dropcap]ast week, I woke up one morning to a surprising alert on my phone. I’d spent an average of seven hours a day wrapped up in the interwebs. I vowed to change that, and so far it’s going well. I spend more time reading books, biking and meditating. Why was my online habit out of control? Blame it on isolation. Blame it on boredom. Blame it on…Clubhouse?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Clubhouse is a new app that allows users to moderate conversations using audio. It isn’t a dating app per se, but some people are sparking relationships on the platform. Funny enough, my very first evening on Clubhouse was a study in sensuality. I noticed a room titled “Mike Lowry’s ‘The Moan Room’” and thought to myself, “Well, this is funny.” A few hours later, I had not only competed in a moaning challenge, but I won! I did all of this while wearing my bonnet, face mask drying and cat resting comfortably beside me. (Mind you, my cat did occasionally stare up at me, visibility alarmed, as I groaned into my iPhone.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The “Moan Room” on Clubhouse is now a thing of the past. Internet trends move swiftly like that. But it was a glimpse at the new and innovative methods people are utilizing to ignite passion. What the activities I indulge in are teaching me is that, single or in companionship, I’ll remain adventurous. Of course, I’m not closed off to the possibility of love, but I’m also fully capable of entertaining my darn self. I also refuse to place the burden of harvesting my own happiness on someone else. Some call it solitude, I call it a commitment to my own serenity.\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Rather than jumping into something lackluster to avoid loneliness, learning to enjoy your own company might be the key to happiness.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1705019478,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":12,"wordCount":1002},"headData":{"title":"It’s Not Me, It’s You: Choosing Singledom in the Pandemic | KQED","description":"Rather than jumping into something lackluster to avoid loneliness, learning to enjoy your own company might be the key to happiness.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":"","schema":{"@context":"http://schema.org","@type":"Article","headline":"It’s Not Me, It’s You: Choosing Singledom in the Pandemic","datePublished":"2021-02-12T19:36:39.000Z","dateModified":"2024-01-12T00:31:18.000Z","image":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/KQED-OG-Image@1x.png"}},"source":"Commentary","sourceUrl":"https://www.kqed.org/artscommentary","sticky":false,"nprByline":"Maddy Clifford","templateType":"standard","featuredImageType":"standard","path":"/arts/13892743/its-not-me-its-you-choosing-singledom-in-the-pandemic","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class=\"utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__dropcapShortcode__dropcap\">Y\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>ou’ve probably heard of FOMO, or Fear of Missing Out. But the singles among us are likelier to encounter something else while stuck inside and swiping on dating apps: FOBO—Fear of Better Options.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Coined by Patrick McGinnis, \u003ca href=\"https://patrickmcginnis.com/blog/meet-fobo-the-evil-brother-of-fomo-that-can-ruin-your-life/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">FOBO\u003c/a> is the free fall of overthinking every possible option and inevitably remaining in free fall. That’s one drawback of looking for love online during the pandemic. Apps are not just an entertaining way to pass the time—they’re one of the few means of meeting new people safely. But they’re also designed to provide a sense of instant gratification. And some people confuse Tinder with Grubhub, approaching people like a buffet of viable partner options.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The problem with this mindset is it’s impossible to fix the perfect plate. Or maybe you took what you could get to distract yourself, or dipped into the compost bin to reignite an old flame, only to find yourself unsatisfied.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>These scenarios operate on the anxiety that COVID-19 is looming overhead. Opportunities to find companionship feel scarce, and some might feel tempted to tolerate flakiness, incompatibility or even disrespect to feel less alone. But the fact is, it’s hard to have a fear of better options when you realize the better option is probably yourself. While \u003ca href=\"https://www.huffpost.com/entry/tweets-dating-covid_l_5f45444cc5b6c00d03b4b0a3\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">articles\u003c/a> about single life during the pandemic paint a purely pessimistic picture, this narrative is tired. I’d argue that the pandemic has only accelerated changes in courtship, dating and marriage that were already underway. \u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"aside","attributes":{"named":{"postid":"arts_13892182,arts_13892333","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Maybe you got lucky and found the one, but if you haven’t, this past year has provided you with two options: either choose to meet the loneliness head on or jump into something lackluster to sidetrack yourself from discomfort. If you choose the latter, you might find yourself rushing into an entanglement for the simple sake of closeness. And I wouldn’t blame you. I tried dating out of fear of my solitude at first. I was giddy with the increased level of courtship involved—picnics in my front yard, trips to outdoor dining while masked up. Navigating COVID-19 safety caused me to abstain from sex for a year. I’m also just at a point in my life where I’m exhausted by games and don’t want just anyone in my intimate sphere. I had fun, especially in the summer. I even convinced myself that I’d roll with one situationship, but soon realized the lack of emotional depth was doing me more harm than my own company. I chose myself.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The thing is, once you’ve known tranquility, you’ll never take it for granted again. This past year cost many people their lives and livelihoods; it upended most of the social norms. And that stress doesn’t go away if you’re in a relationship. And if you don’t choose a partner wisely, that stress will only increase. For all the challenges this year has posed, I’ve also known peace of mind \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2021/02/05/963531042/malcolm-marie-is-lost-just-like-its-central-couple\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Malcolm and Marie\u003c/em>\u003c/a> could only dream of. Is working through loneliness such a bad thing? Some of us have actually been reaching astronomical levels of self-actualization.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And according to recent research, if you’re a woman who dates men, you’re might be\u003ca href=\"https://happiful.com/single-men-suffering-most-from-loneliness/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"> more resilient\u003c/a> against the stressors of the pandemic than the men you date. That’s because men are socialized to use romantic relationships as their \u003ca href=\"https://www.harpersbazaar.com/culture/features/a27259689/toxic-masculinity-male-friendships-emotional-labor-men-rely-on-women/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">only means of emotional support\u003c/a>, and are less \u003ca href=\"https://www.theguardian.com/society/2016/nov/05/men-less-likely-to-get-help--mental-health\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">likely to get professional help\u003c/a>. Tired of playing therapist, more women are choosing to stay single than ever before, a trend we might see COVID accelerating. Millennials are also \u003ca href=\"https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2018-09-25/millennials-are-causing-the-u-s-divorce-rate-to-plummet\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">waiting to get married\u003c/a>, which has meant that marriages are lasting longer than they did in the past. Perhaps being the children of a generation with a high divorce rate has taught us a thing or two about getting our lives and finances in order before getting serious or tying the knot.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class=\"utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__dropcapShortcode__dropcap\">L\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>ast week, I woke up one morning to a surprising alert on my phone. I’d spent an average of seven hours a day wrapped up in the interwebs. I vowed to change that, and so far it’s going well. I spend more time reading books, biking and meditating. Why was my online habit out of control? Blame it on isolation. Blame it on boredom. Blame it on…Clubhouse?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Clubhouse is a new app that allows users to moderate conversations using audio. It isn’t a dating app per se, but some people are sparking relationships on the platform. Funny enough, my very first evening on Clubhouse was a study in sensuality. I noticed a room titled “Mike Lowry’s ‘The Moan Room’” and thought to myself, “Well, this is funny.” A few hours later, I had not only competed in a moaning challenge, but I won! I did all of this while wearing my bonnet, face mask drying and cat resting comfortably beside me. (Mind you, my cat did occasionally stare up at me, visibility alarmed, as I groaned into my iPhone.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The “Moan Room” on Clubhouse is now a thing of the past. Internet trends move swiftly like that. But it was a glimpse at the new and innovative methods people are utilizing to ignite passion. What the activities I indulge in are teaching me is that, single or in companionship, I’ll remain adventurous. Of course, I’m not closed off to the possibility of love, but I’m also fully capable of entertaining my darn self. I also refuse to place the burden of harvesting my own happiness on someone else. Some call it solitude, I call it a commitment to my own serenity.\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/arts/13892743/its-not-me-its-you-choosing-singledom-in-the-pandemic","authors":["byline_arts_13892743"],"categories":["arts_1","arts_2303"],"tags":["arts_2767","arts_10342","arts_10278","arts_9599","arts_6672","arts_3923"],"featImg":"arts_13892755","label":"source_arts_13892743"}},"programsReducer":{"possible":{"id":"possible","title":"Possible","info":"Possible is hosted by entrepreneur Reid Hoffman and writer Aria Finger. Together in Possible, Hoffman and Finger lead enlightening discussions about building a brighter collective future. The show features interviews with visionary guests like Trevor Noah, Sam Altman and Janette Sadik-Khan. Possible paints an optimistic portrait of the world we can create through science, policy, business, art and our shared humanity. It asks: What if everything goes right for once? How can we get there? Each episode also includes a short fiction story generated by advanced AI GPT-4, serving as a thought-provoking springboard to speculate how humanity could leverage technology for good.","airtime":"SUN 2pm","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Possible-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://www.possible.fm/","meta":{"site":"news","source":"Possible"},"link":"/radio/program/possible","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/possible/id1677184070","spotify":"https://open.spotify.com/show/730YpdUSNlMyPQwNnyjp4k"}},"1a":{"id":"1a","title":"1A","info":"1A is home to the national conversation. 1A brings on great guests and frames the best debate in ways that make you think, share and engage.","airtime":"MON-THU 11pm-12am","imageSrc":"https://ww2.kqed.org/radio/wp-content/uploads/sites/50/2018/04/1a.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://the1a.org/","meta":{"site":"news","source":"npr"},"link":"/radio/program/1a","subscribe":{"npr":"https://rpb3r.app.goo.gl/RBrW","apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?s=143441&mt=2&id=1188724250&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/radio/1A-p947376/","rss":"https://feeds.npr.org/510316/podcast.xml"}},"all-things-considered":{"id":"all-things-considered","title":"All Things Considered","info":"Every weekday, \u003cem>All Things Considered\u003c/em> hosts Robert Siegel, Audie Cornish, Ari Shapiro, and Kelly McEvers present the program's trademark mix of news, interviews, commentaries, reviews, and offbeat features. Michel Martin hosts on the weekends.","airtime":"MON-FRI 1pm-2pm, 4:30pm-6:30pm\u003cbr />SAT-SUN 5pm-6pm","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/All-Things-Considered-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://www.npr.org/programs/all-things-considered/","meta":{"site":"news","source":"npr"},"link":"/radio/program/all-things-considered"},"american-suburb-podcast":{"id":"american-suburb-podcast","title":"American Suburb: The Podcast","tagline":"The flip side of gentrification, told through one town","info":"Gentrification is changing cities across America, forcing people from neighborhoods they have long called home. Call them the displaced. Now those priced out of the Bay Area are looking for a better life in an unlikely place. American Suburb follows this migration to one California town along the Delta, 45 miles from San Francisco. But is this once sleepy suburb ready for them?","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/American-Suburb-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"/news/series/american-suburb-podcast","meta":{"site":"news","source":"kqed","order":"13"},"link":"/news/series/american-suburb-podcast/","subscribe":{"npr":"https://rpb3r.app.goo.gl/RBrW","apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?mt=2&id=1287748328","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/radio/American-Suburb-p1086805/","rss":"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/series/american-suburb-podcast/feed/podcast","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vS1FJTkMzMDExODgxNjA5"}},"baycurious":{"id":"baycurious","title":"Bay Curious","tagline":"Exploring the Bay Area, one question at a time","info":"KQED’s new podcast, Bay Curious, gets to the bottom of the mysteries — both profound and peculiar — that give the Bay Area its unique identity. And we’ll do it with your help! You ask the questions. You decide what Bay Curious investigates. And you join us on the journey to find the answers.","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Bay-Curious-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg","imageAlt":"\"KQED Bay Curious","officialWebsiteLink":"/news/series/baycurious","meta":{"site":"news","source":"kqed","order":"4"},"link":"/podcasts/baycurious","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bay-curious/id1172473406","npr":"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/500557090/bay-curious","rss":"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/category/bay-curious-podcast/feed/podcast","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly93dzIua3FlZC5vcmcvbmV3cy9jYXRlZ29yeS9iYXktY3VyaW91cy1wb2RjYXN0L2ZlZWQvcG9kY2FzdA","stitcher":"https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kqed/bay-curious","spotify":"https://open.spotify.com/show/6O76IdmhixfijmhTZLIJ8k"}},"bbc-world-service":{"id":"bbc-world-service","title":"BBC World Service","info":"The day's top stories from BBC News compiled twice daily in the week, once at weekends.","airtime":"MON-FRI 9pm-10pm, TUE-FRI 1am-2am","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/BBC-World-Service-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/live:bbc_world_service","meta":{"site":"news","source":"BBC World Service"},"link":"/radio/program/bbc-world-service","subscribe":{"apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/global-news-podcast/id135067274?mt=2","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/radio/BBC-World-Service-p455581/","rss":"https://podcasts.files.bbci.co.uk/p02nq0gn.rss"}},"code-switch-life-kit":{"id":"code-switch-life-kit","title":"Code Switch / Life Kit","info":"\u003cem>Code Switch\u003c/em>, which listeners will hear in the first part of the hour, has fearless and much-needed conversations about race. Hosted by journalists of color, the show tackles the subject of race head-on, exploring how it impacts every part of society — from politics and pop culture to history, sports and more.\u003cbr />\u003cbr />\u003cem>Life Kit\u003c/em>, which will be in the second part of the hour, guides you through spaces and feelings no one prepares you for — from finances to mental health, from workplace microaggressions to imposter syndrome, from relationships to parenting. The show features experts with real world experience and shares their knowledge. Because everyone needs a little help being human.\u003cbr />\u003cbr />\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/510312/codeswitch\">\u003cem>Code Switch\u003c/em> offical site and podcast\u003c/a>\u003cbr />\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/lifekit\">\u003cem>Life Kit\u003c/em> offical site and podcast\u003c/a>\u003cbr />","airtime":"SUN 9pm-10pm","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Code-Switch-Life-Kit-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg","meta":{"site":"radio","source":"npr"},"link":"/radio/program/code-switch-life-kit","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/1112190608?mt=2&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnByLm9yZy9yc3MvcG9kY2FzdC5waHA_aWQ9NTEwMzEy","spotify":"https://open.spotify.com/show/3bExJ9JQpkwNhoHvaIIuyV","rss":"https://feeds.npr.org/510312/podcast.xml"}},"commonwealth-club":{"id":"commonwealth-club","title":"Commonwealth Club of California Podcast","info":"The Commonwealth Club of California is the nation's oldest and largest public affairs forum. As a non-partisan forum, The Club brings to the public airwaves diverse viewpoints on important topics. The Club's weekly radio broadcast - the oldest in the U.S., dating back to 1924 - is carried across the nation on public radio stations and is now podcasting. Our website archive features audio of our recent programs, as well as selected speeches from our long and distinguished history. This podcast feed is usually updated twice a week and is always un-edited.","airtime":"THU 10pm, FRI 1am","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Commonwealth-Club-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://www.commonwealthclub.org/podcasts","meta":{"site":"news","source":"Commonwealth Club of California"},"link":"/radio/program/commonwealth-club","subscribe":{"apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/commonwealth-club-of-california-podcast/id976334034?mt=2","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cDovL3d3dy5jb21tb253ZWFsdGhjbHViLm9yZy9hdWRpby9wb2RjYXN0L3dlZWtseS54bWw","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/radio/Commonwealth-Club-of-California-p1060/"}},"considerthis":{"id":"considerthis","title":"Consider This","tagline":"Make sense of the day","info":"Make sense of the day. Every weekday afternoon, Consider This helps you consider the major stories of the day in less than 15 minutes, featuring the reporting and storytelling resources of NPR. Plus, KQED’s Bianca Taylor brings you the local KQED news you need to know.","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Consider-This-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg","imageAlt":"Consider This from NPR and KQED","officialWebsiteLink":"/podcasts/considerthis","meta":{"site":"news","source":"kqed","order":"7"},"link":"/podcasts/considerthis","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1503226625?mt=2&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory","npr":"https://rpb3r.app.goo.gl/coronavirusdaily","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5ucHIub3JnLzUxMDM1NS9wb2RjYXN0LnhtbA","spotify":"https://open.spotify.com/show/3Z6JdCS2d0eFEpXHKI6WqH"}},"forum":{"id":"forum","title":"Forum","tagline":"The conversation starts here","info":"KQED’s live call-in program discussing local, state, national and international issues, as well as in-depth interviews.","airtime":"MON-FRI 9am-11am, 10pm-11pm","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Forum-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg","imageAlt":"KQED Forum with Mina Kim and Alexis Madrigal","officialWebsiteLink":"/forum","meta":{"site":"news","source":"kqed","order":"8"},"link":"/forum","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/kqeds-forum/id73329719","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vS1FJTkM5NTU3MzgxNjMz","npr":"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/432307980/forum","stitcher":"https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kqedfm-kqeds-forum-podcast","rss":"https://feeds.megaphone.fm/KQINC9557381633"}},"freakonomics-radio":{"id":"freakonomics-radio","title":"Freakonomics Radio","info":"Freakonomics Radio is a one-hour award-winning podcast and public-radio project hosted by Stephen Dubner, with co-author Steve Levitt as a regular guest. It is produced in partnership with WNYC.","imageSrc":"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2018/05/freakonomicsRadio.png","officialWebsiteLink":"http://freakonomics.com/","airtime":"SUN 1am-2am, SAT 3pm-4pm","meta":{"site":"radio","source":"WNYC"},"link":"/radio/program/freakonomics-radio","subscribe":{"npr":"https://rpb3r.app.goo.gl/4s8b","apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/freakonomics-radio/id354668519","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/podcasts/WNYC-Podcasts/Freakonomics-Radio-p272293/","rss":"https://feeds.feedburner.com/freakonomicsradio"}},"fresh-air":{"id":"fresh-air","title":"Fresh Air","info":"Hosted by Terry Gross, \u003cem>Fresh Air from WHYY\u003c/em> is the Peabody Award-winning weekday magazine of contemporary arts and issues. One of public radio's most popular programs, Fresh Air features intimate conversations with today's biggest luminaries.","airtime":"MON-FRI 7pm-8pm","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Fresh-Air-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://www.npr.org/programs/fresh-air/","meta":{"site":"radio","source":"npr"},"link":"/radio/program/fresh-air","subscribe":{"npr":"https://rpb3r.app.goo.gl/4s8b","apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?s=143441&mt=2&id=214089682&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/radio/Fresh-Air-p17/","rss":"https://feeds.npr.org/381444908/podcast.xml"}},"here-and-now":{"id":"here-and-now","title":"Here & Now","info":"A live production of NPR and WBUR Boston, in collaboration with stations across the country, Here & Now reflects the fluid world of news as it's happening in the middle of the day, with timely, in-depth news, interviews and conversation. 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