Mendocino County Mom Turns Trauma, Violence Into Career Teaching Life Lessons

Mendocino County has one of the highest rates of children living in foster care, double the rate for California, according to the UC Berkeley California Child Welfare Indicators Project. Jade Aldrich sees this statistic come to life during her work as a parenting skills teacher in the coastal city of Fort Bragg, population 7,250. Her latest class was full of parents recently addicted to alcoholism or methamphetamines. These were parents trying to get their children back from Child Protective Services.

Aldrich said the parents' experience of having their children taken away is devastating. But through her classes, parents are "able to bond with other people grieving the long row of loopholes to getting their children back once they’ve been removed from the household.”

The eight-to-10 week sessions, free of charge, tackle how to calmly manage temper tantrums, bedtime battles and other daily challenges of family life.

Parenting can be hard, even in the best of circumstances. Add poverty, unemployment and lack of transportation in an isolated area that is one of the country's largest producers of marijuana, and things can get overwhelming.

Mendocino and neighboring Humboldt County, part of the so-called Emerald Triangle, is the area in the state with the highest prevalence of adults reporting adverse childhood experiences, such as witnessing domestic violence. That's according to a report published last year by the Center for Youth and Wellness in San Francisco.

“It’s generational abuse and neglect that impacts a person’s well-being, and now these are the people having kids,” said Jena Conner, deputy director for family and children services in Mendocino County.

Conner said that unemployment, lack of affordable housing and a dearth of transportation all contribute to the high rate of child neglect in the county. A typical case of her agency acting to remove a child from a household, she said, involves parents who have substance abuse or mental health issues.

“Typically we find that this leads to an unsafe home environment for children and domestic violence,” she said.

Jade Aldrich, the parenting skills teacher, experienced some of those issues first-hand. About 15 years ago, she walked through the brightly decorated doors of the Safe Passage Family Resource Center, where she now works, as an exhausted parent in desperate need of help.

Her partner at the time was a veteran with PTSD and no access to mental health services. He engaged in domestic violence, she says, a traumatic experience for her and her children. She turned to alcohol in response.

"That was definitely one of the most difficult times of my life," Aldrich said.

The family survived on $500 a month on welfare, plus food stamps, while living in a moldy subsidized housing complex that has since been shut down. But it was the birth of her second child that really shook her.

“My partner was not only suffering a mental illness, he was incarcerated," Aldrich said. "So I had to give childbirth on my own. And that was sad. It was definitely emotional for me. It was at that moment that I decided I wanted to offer support to people who felt just like me. I knew that people deserved somebody to stand by their side, somebody to believe in them.”

She studied at College of the Redwoods and California State University, Chico, while working full time and caring for her two young children. It took her years to get her first associate degree in technical preparation, and to become certified as a doula and parenting teacher.

“I was able to turn around and leave waitressing for a career, and that has led me to continue to seek out higher education and the things that are important to me, like parenting,” she said proudly, adding that her oldest daughter is a senior who will be applying to college.

Aldrich credits the Safe Passage Family Resource Center, which was established in 1996, as her lifesaver. The center describes itself as a "one- stop shop" that connects families -- sometimes with a long and daunting list of housing, food and other needs -- to programs and services.

Recently, a small group of Spanish-speaking parents stood at the entrance with children in tow. They scanned a bulletin board with ads for services and free clothes. In a brightly lit room with tapestries and books lining the walls, Aldrich met with Elcie Cooper, a former foster kid who is expecting her first child.

Elcie Cooper, a former foster kid, takes Aldrich's classes to get ready for the birth of her first child. She is due in two weeks. (Farida Jhabvala Romero / KQED)

Cooper had brought 3-D ultrasound pictures of her baby to show Aldrich, who pointed excitedly at the baby’s nose.

“It’s like peeking at a wrapped present!” Aldrich said. During their meeting, Aldrich asked Cooper if she was getting enough food from the local food bank (she was not) and whether Cooper was on the list to wait for subsidized housing (she was).

Cooper grew up in a foster home in Mendocino, and she describes her experience in the foster care system as “horrible.” Her four siblings were separated when their mother lost them to CPS while involved in a string of abusive relationships. Cooper has spent over 10 years trying to reunite her family. Now that she’s becoming a new mom, Cooper said, Aldrich’s example and support are helping her to avoid making her mother’s mistakes.

“Without this support, where would I be?” asked Cooper, who is due to have her baby in two weeks. “Me being the old foster kid, I’m always looking for someone that actually cares to see me do better.”

For Aldrich, it's a great satisfaction to connect with other parents.