green chile

Okay, Green Chile Kitchen? We’re going to have a little chat, and I’m going to talk and you’re going to listen, ‘kay?

We’ve been going to and loving you for quite some time now. We are, quite possibly, your best customers. Hell, one of your checkout chicks commented to my husband, “You haven’t been here in awhile!” (Quite true, we hadn’t, but she noticed which was awesome!) Also, even if you don’t have caller ID, there’s no way you don’t identify us as, “those weird people who order the same salad every time — you know, the ones who always, always want their fifth ingredient to just be more [redacted]?”

You are a feast for us as much as you are a comfort. We revel in your fresh greens, we approve of your new and spicier guacamole, and we laud your Niman Ranchiness. (Sidetrack: Is it just me or is Niman Ranch sort of over? I mean, yes, it’s undeniably good stuff, but I think the most sought-after meat names these days are not the ones that are known across the country. We’re such spoiled Californians.)

So I say this with love: GET ANOTHER FREAKING REGISTER! Seriously? Waiting in line to pick up a take-out order behind all those baked witlings, who have wrapped themselves in blankets after spending the entire day in Alamo Square Park in order to smoke away every single synapse and then come to GCK, not knowing what the hell they want to order because they got distracted by a shiny object while standing in line and then try to inveigle your eminently patient checkout chicks in deep discussions about her back tattooes, all while my crispy tacos get so decidedly UNcrispy that they sog their bottoms out when I pick them up, well, there is a limit.

You always do apologize, probably both for the long wait and idiot customers, but still, can we talk about solutions here? Please?

TWO REGISTERS! One for orders made there and for those intending to eat-in, and the other to ring up and dispense take-out orders. Plus, even if there aren’t enough take-out orders at any given time to merit the other register, at least the line can be filtered over to a second reg, rendering the wait shorter and ALL of our lives easier.

Seriously. I really just want this to work out.

Green Chile Kitchen Revisited, Reranted 28 April,2008Stephanie Lucianovic

  • The absolute pits is going through all that and then having them NOT apologize for the long wait or the idiot customers. My last trip to GCK was so unpleasant that Im not sure Ill be going back…

  • chiligirl

    My thought is that they should just have a waiter and table service for eaters in so that there can be no long line. I ate there the other night and was deeply annoyed at having to wait in line while I was there to eat in. At least at dinnertime, right?

  • Thy

    I was just there this past Friday for lunch with friends. The wait didn’t seem bad even at 12:45, but I’ve never been on the weekend. Their pozole is my favorite dish there–so good!


Stephanie Lucianovic

A former picky eater, Stephanie V.W. Lucianovic is a writer, editor, and lapsed cheesemonger in the San Francisco Bay Area. A culinary school grad with an English lit degree, she has written for,, Popular Science, The New York Times, The Washington Post, and The Boston Globe. Additionally, she has been writing for KQED’s Bay Area Bites since its inception and is the website editor for KQED’s Emmy-award winning show “Check, Please! Bay Area.”

Stephanie was an original recapper at Television Without Pity and worked on a line of cookbooks for William-Sonoma as well as in the back kitchen of a Jacques Pépin cooking show. Her first book, SUFFERING SUCCOTASH: A Picky Eater’s Quest To Understand Why We Hate the Foods We Hate (Perigee Books, 2012) is a non-fiction narrative and a heartfelt and humorous exposé on the inner lives of picky eaters that Scientific American called “hilarious” and “the perfect popular science book for a reader that doesn’t think he or she wants to read a popular science book.”

Stephanie lives in Menlo Park with her husband, three-year-old son, assorted cats, and has been blogging at The Grub Report for over a decade.

Follow her on Twitter at @grubreport

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